ANS jokes
A bully told an orphan to cry to his parents, so he did.
His adoptive parents were very supportive about the situation, and everything was settled. He died in an accident a day later.
I just took an orange soda bath this morning. The next thing I knew, it turned out to be a river of Orange Crush.
What type of flower do you give an orphan?
A self-raising [flour].
Orphans have 362 days in a year because they don’t have a Mother’s or Father’s Day and no birthday.
Why can you hit an orphan?
They can't tell their parents.
he don't hate me fully
I asked my mom with cerebral palsy a question.
Still waiting on an answer.
What’s an orphan’s favorite holidays? Mothers’ and Father’s Day.
What do you call it when an orphan takes a photo of himself?
A family photo.
One day, the Pope is coming to America in his limo, and he said to the driver, "Why don’t you let me drive for once?"
The driver thinks to himself, "Well, I can’t say no to this guy; he’s the Pope." So the driver pulls over, and they change places. The Pope was having fun, hauling butt down the freeway, dogging cars. After a while, the driver taps on the window and tells the Pope, "Slow down a bit; you might get pulled over."
The Pope says, "Ahhh, don’t worry about it; I’m the Pope." So he rolls up the window and continues to drive very fast. After a few moments, he gets pulled over. The cop walks to the car, and the Pope rolls down the tinted window. The cop sees the Pope and says, "Oh, I, ehhh, sorry, can you hold on a minute?"
The Pope says, "Sure." The cop walks back to his car and radios back to the station. He says, "Guys, I just pulled over someone really important."
They ask who, "The President?"
"No, more important."
"The president of another country?"
"No, more important."
"An ambassador?"
"No, even more important."
"Well, who is it?"
"I don’t know, but the Pope is the chauffeur."
Where do orphans go when sad?
Not their parents.
What do you call a riot full of white people?
An avalanche.
A man walked into a bar with an AK-47 with a 50-round mag and yelled out, "Who the fuck fucked my wife?" Everyone was quiet.
One man at the back stood up and called, "Sorry mate, but I don't think you have enough bullets."
Shut the f*** up, I am an orphan!
What is the difference between you and an orphan?
Orphans have zero family.
Bully: You're so short you hand-glide on a chip.
Short person: Well, at least I don’t look like a giraffe that just came out of an oven!
What do you get when you cut an onion?
Onion jizz.
Now why an office supply keep rape videos, to make sure it was on tape?
What's the difference between an orphan and an apple tree?
The apples get picked.
Fritz Cheng was asked to write three articles on the subject. He went to his grandmother and advised her: "Question: Kill people! I am sorry, Mr. Fritz, I am looking for his brother—what do you suggest?"
Brother: "I'm Superman. I am Superman!"
Fritz remembers entering the room. That's Alfredo's question in front of the TV: "Do you have any advice?"
Fritz tells a story from his school days. "Remember our words?" said Professor Fleck. "An artist? Is that true? Frison, who are you?"
"I am Superman. I'm Superman," he said. "I hope to meet the president."
What is bigger than an elephant but smaller than two elephants?
A different sized elephant.