Smell

Anonymous

Why would you not let an elephant sleep in the same bed with you? Because they stinks and now the room smells like elephant shit.

Happening

Punisher

What happens when animals do a squat?

It doesn’t become pretty…

Cheetah

EIGHTLOVESTIKTOKLOL

What animal can’t you trust with your homework?

A: A cheet dah!

Octopus

Anonymous

A man walks into a bar with his pet octopus and proudly claims the animal can play any musical instrument. The bartender pulls out a guitar from behind the bar and gives it to the octopus, which plays an amazing solo. Just then a scotsman walks into the bar with a set of bagpipes. The octopus grabs the instrument and wrestles around with it on the ground, flailing about making a horrible sound. The bartender says “Hey, looks like he can’t play that!”, and the octopus says, “Play it? As soon as I get it’s pajamas off, I’m gonna fuck it!”

Car

Anonymous

Student: There is 505 rocks in a car, if 8 fall out how many are left Teacher: There will be 497 rocks left Student: Ok!! Student: How do you put a alligator in a closet Teacher: You can’t it wont fit Student: No!! Student: Just open the door, put the alligator in, then close the door Teacher: Ohhh now i get it

Paper

dead baby fergustus

First Date: HE:“i work with animals every day!” SHE:“oh how sweet! what is it that you do?” HE:“I’m a butcher” SHE:“perfect i work with humans i just kill them by cutting them up!” HE:"so its you in the news paper?"SHE:"yes it was,wanna be next?" HE:“no!”

Date

dead meat

First Date: HE:"i work with animals every day!" SHE:"oh how sweet! what is it that you do?" HE:"I’m a butcher" SHE:“were through!”

Means

sup

i would slap you , but that would be animal abuse

Fish

Ciara._.Rayne

Q: What’s an animation similar to finding nemo but the fish has cancer? A: Finding kemo

Night

Anonymous

What animal has more lives than a cat?

A frog. It Croaks every night

Number

J0K35 (week 1)

lol 1 week anniversary of me being on Worst Jokes Ever…

J0K35: LETS START A JOKING KEGGAR

A Joking keggar is where i get you drunk with some jokes, only on a special occasion.

Ok, yall ready to get drunk with raging jokes? OK LETS GOOOOo

What do you call an LGBTQ+ disc jockey?

A DG (dee gay)

What does lava use when it can’t walk properly?

A volCANEo

What do crackheads do when a black man got brutalitized?

They start a HIGHot (say it like hiot riot)

What is Satan’s favorite DJ?

MarshHELLo

What do neck breakers use?

Snapchat

What did Twitter and Reddit eat with chocolate and marshmellows?

Instagraham crackers

Is this the last joke?

No

What is similar between a dog and my ex?

They are both commonly known as bitches

What number has a flu from a pig?

Nine flu (swine flu)

What did the loaf say when he was playing hide and seek?

BREADY OR NOT? HERE I GOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO

Who is the best anime girl?

Well its pretty obvious 02 is on the second rank

Why did Sally get caned?

Because old men hurriCANED.

That was all

OR WAS IT?

Yes, it was (Come back on Halloween for another Joking Keggar)

Cow

Anonymous

What was the first animal in space?

The cow that jumped over the moon!

Poor

J0K35

Why did the chicken cross the road?

Because these jokes are not funny

Heres why the chicken crossed the road…

The chicken was on the run from a crazy-ass butcher ready to murder the poor thing, so the chicken crossed the road.The chicken was crossing the road, then a blind kid saw the chicken, and the kid was hit by a flying rock, his vision was blurred (what vision?) and was actually cured of the blind. The chicken ran and jumped into a truck’s opening, and was never seen again… The kid got up from the ground and looked at the road, to see the chicken was not there, and said…" The chicken crossed the road…" The kid yelled at everyone about the chicken crossing the road, and got a lot of positive attention. Facebook, Instagram, Twitter, and Reddit was full of the chicken nonsense, and gained widespread attention from N.A to Asia in only 1 day.

The butcher was arrested for the attempted murder of a joke animal, and was sentenced to over 20 years in solitary confinement, and a few weeks later, the sentence was moved to a life sentence, and the butcher became known as The ChicKiller.

The End (hope you enjoyed, i was bored so i made this shit…)

Hole

J0K35

What is a donkey called when it has a hole on itself?

An ASSHole.

Chicken

Anonymous

Why are chickens so awesome ? (Bcauseeee) Chicken noise

Magic

Anonymous

Q: what do you call a magic owl

A: HOOdini

Baseball

Stephanie

What animal is good at baseball? A bat 🦇

Game

Stephanie

What animal is always at a baseball game? A bat

Trust

Daniel King

What animal can not be trusted?

A lion 🦁

Baseball

Daniel King

What animal is good at baseball ⚾️?

A bat 🦇

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