Animal

Animal Jokes

Eagle

Why is the eagle a bird with many skills? Because it’s talon-ted!

Turtle

Why was the turtle looking at her phone?

She wanted to take a shellfie.

Roster

Why did the roster cross the road twice?

To prove it was not a chicken.

Baguette

A boy asks a zookeeper, "Why is there a baguette in a cage?"

The zookeeper says, "It's bread in captivity!"

Cow

Where do cows go to see the big screen? The mooo-vie theater.

Poker

Why doesn't anyone play poker in the jungle? Too many cheetahs.

Cow

What is the difference between a cow and 9/11?

You can’t milk a cow for 15 years.

Bisexual

Q. What do they call an ISIS terrorist who owns both a camel and a goat?

A. Bisexual.

Comma

What’s the Difference Between a Cat and a Comma?

One has claws at the end of its paws, and the other is a pause at the end of a clause.

Wood

How much wood could a woodchuck chuck?

If a woodchuck could chuck wood?

As much wood as a woodchuck could chuck,

If a woodchuck could chuck wood.

Cow

I was on the train today and saw a cow on it.

It was quite strange until I realized it was Alfie's mum.

Bat

Why did the bat fall out of the tree?

It couldn’t hang in there.