Animal jokes
What do you call the bear that pushes all the other bears into the pool?
The dry bear.
My bird. PRETTY BIRD! PRETTY BIRD!
Others CHIRP CHIRP CHIRP!
What does a cow watch?
MooTube.
What's the difference between a bus full of children and a fish?
The fish can swim.
Q: Why did the elephant paint his toenails red?
A: To hide up cherry trees.
Q: What's the loudest noise in the jungle?
A: Giraffes eating cherries.
What has four legs and one arm?
A rottweiler at a park.
What do you call a sad Doge?
What?
Nothing but Sarrrooooddd!
Why do ducks have feathers?
To cover their butt quacks.
What did the angry cow say to its enemy?
"We have beef!"
How do cows say "oof?"
They say, "MOOf."
I have a pussy. It's very hairy. It has a long thing sticking out of it. It's also very hair. My hairy pussy meows and purrs.
How do you count cows?
With a cowculator.
What is a cow's favorite move? -- The sound of moooosic.
Poipole walks into a bar and says “poipoipoipoi.”
The bartender says, “Sorry, but in order to get takeout, you have to know how to speak a foreign language.” Poipole says “Pika!”
Roses are red, Your blood is too. You look like a monkey and belong in a zoo.
Do not worry, I will be there too, Not in a cage but laughing at you!
There were 32 cows. Twenty-eight chickens. How many were there?
There were 32 cows. Twenty ate chickens. How many were there?
What's black and red/read all over? A baby skunk with a bad case of diaper rash!
Why do elephants never get rich?
Because they work for peanuts!
Why was Timmy sad? Because his dad stapled a frog to his forehead.
What do you call a pig with two legs? Meeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeee!
Hahahahahahahahahahahahahahahhhahahaa