Animal jokes
Why are monkeys funny? Because they look weird.
What do you call a cow that just gave birth?
De-calf-inated.
Knock, knock.
Who's there?
Cows say, "Moo, not who."
What do you call a deer with no eyes? No eyed deer.
What do u call a deer with no eyes or legs? Still no eyed deer.
What do u call a deer with no eyes, no legs and no balls? Still no f*#$in eyed deer.
What did the bull say to his son when he was going to school? "Bison!"
I am a sheep.
Why did I shoot my dog?
Because it pissed me offff! Ahhhhhahahahahahahahahaha! 👌👌😎
Why did the chicken cross the road?
Heehheehehehehehehe
To get to the other side. Ahaahahahahahahahahahahaa!
Q: What do you get when you cross a cow and a smurf?
A: Blue cheese.
Why is a deck of cards similar to a miniature pony?
They are both jokers.
What do you get when you cross a chicken and a horse?
An animal abuse warrant.
Why aren't dogs known as carrots? Because they aren't.
Why did the elephant cross the road? It didn't see the cars.
What do a moose and a triceratops have in common?
Both have noses.
Anyone who says they don't like cats has never had one cooked right...
What do you call a fish with no eyes?
Pssh.
Why don't stags buy drugs? Because they are too deer.
What did Homer Simpson say when he ran over a deer? "DOE!"
What do you call a bunch of llamas?
Alpaca llama.
Why do cheetahs have spots? Chicken pox.