Animal jokes
Why was the cow afraid?
Because he's a coward!
How do you count cows with a cowculator?
Yee.
Knock, knock.
"Who's there?"
Cow says,
"Cow says who?"
No! Cow says moo!
Why did Beethoven get rid of his chickens?
They were always saying "Bach, Bach, Bach". And his cows preferred Moo-zak.
My friend Joe was a great hunter. He always shot like 3 deer every week.
He was even better at school when he bagged 30 of them.
How does the bunny keep his fur neat?
With a hare brush.
Why did the chicken cross the road?
Why?
To visit the ugly witch's house.
Knock, knock...
Who's there?
The chicken!
My owl turned 180 today.
He isn’t old, he just has a bad neck.
yo mama so fat she went swimming with the whales and sang "weeeeeee areeeee fammmilllyyyyy!!!!!!!"
Indian porn
Ooooh oooh oooh
Baaaaaa
Why did the roster cross the road twice?
To prove it was not a chicken.
What do you get when you cross a vacuum and a rooster?
A cock sucker.
Why do crabs never give to charity? Because they're all shellfish.
Why do dogs like skeletons?
Because they're boneheads.
Why do bunnies like Bruno Mars? Because he got 24 carrots.
What do you call a cow in a moving van?
A: A mooving cow.
What did the cow say to the farmer? Moo away!
Reporter: "Excuse me, may I interview you?"
Man: "Yes!"
Reporter: "Name?"
Man: "Abdul Al-Rhazim."
Reporter: "Sex?"
Man: "Three to five times a week."
Reporter: "No no! I mean male or female?"
Man: "Yes, male, female... sometimes camel."
Reporter: "Holy cow!"
Man: "Yes, cow, sheep... animals in general."
Reporter: "But isn't that hostile?"
Man: "Yes, horse style, dog style, any style."
Reporter: "Oh dear!"
Man: "No, no deer. Deer run too fast. Hard to catch."
What's a cow's favorite thing?
A mooooovie.