And jokes
What would you throw between a priest and a nun? A bottle of whiskey.
Chuck Norris heard that nothing in the world could kill him.
So he tracked down nothing in the world and killed it.
Instead of the line, "This girl's on fire," my friend can relate to, "The baby in the oven's on fire, and I need to take it the f*ck out!"
If an emo kid and the quiet kid had a fight, the quiet kid would win because the emo kid would cut himself to death.
Walk up to an emo and say, "I like your cuts G."
Memes
Double it and give it to the next person
(True story) Today I was bringing some tortilla chips upstairs for some chips and dip, and I dropped them, so my mom goes “Oh, now they’re broken.”
And I took an opportunity to make a pun, so I said, “No, they’re just chipped.”
What's black and white and red all over? An American School.
Why are orphans always famous?
Because they say, "Go big or go home," and orphans only have one option.
Freddy, Bonnie, Cheka, Foxy, and Balloon Boy FNAF.
What's big and white and can't climb trees?
A fridge.
Q: What's really long and black?
A: The line at KFC.
A man comes home, and the wife says, "My ex just died by getting hit by a bus." And the husband said, "I lost my job as a bus driver."
A kid named Timmy said to his dad that he had sex with his teacher, and his dad was proud of him and gave him a bike.
The kid said, "I can't use it; my butt hurts!"
People wear chokers, and I'm a choker too, because I tried to choke myself 6 times.
Why do orphans eat cereal with water?
Because their dad left and never came back home with the milk.
Today when I looked in the mirror, I stopped and simply said: "It's ok, what's inside matters the most, right?"
what do baby’s and grenades have in common?
They both are silent but then when thrown at someone make a loud noise
What do the Twin Towers and genders have in common? There used to be two of them, but now it's a sensitive subject.
What holiday can an orphan not celebrate?
Mother's Day and Father's Day.
Me going to jail for telling the orphan he has 363 days because mothers and Father’s Day.