Aed jokes

Stephen Hawking doesn't go for a stroll. He goes for a roll.

I'll tell you a good joke. Stephen Hawking went for a walk.

If you look up the word "wheelchair" in a dictionary, you will see a picture of Stephen Hawking.

At least he got D.L.A. (Disability Living Allowance), so it's not all bad. Every cloud has a silver lining...even a mushroom cloud.

Knock knock. Who's there? Beep boop S.t.e.p.h.e.n beep boop H.a.w.k.i.n.g.

I went home and I saw my friend kissing my sister. I said, "What’s going on?" They both told me that they’re going out with each other. I said, "Alright."

The next morning, I see my friend kissing my mom. I said, "What’s going here?" They both told me they’re going out with each other. Then my friend said to me, "I gave you 3 gifts. 1 gift, I’m your best friend. 2 gift, I’m your new brother-in-law. 3 gift, I’m your new stepfather." I felt so happy I had a friend that [is] looking out for me.

One day I was going home, and 7 married men came to me and said, "You should be proud of your sister." I asked why. They told me it was the best that they ever had, and we got your sister a trophy.

So I went home, my sister said, "Look at my trophy I earned." The trophy said "The Best Blow Jobs." As a bro, I couldn’t be more prouder.

Q: Why did baby shark cross the Pacific Ocean?

A: To find his dad.

This had me wheezing 😂🤣😂🤣

Stephen Hawking was a bit of a hardcase. He didn't let people push him around.

If Stephen Hawking was a boxer, he would roll with the punches.

I can't walk, I can't talk, but I can drive a wheelchair.

Could never understand why people would say Stephen Hawking is a dead man walking.

What color is Stephen Hawking's house?

It's a bungalow.

Stephen Hawking was a spac. But if you put an E on the end, you get space, and he loved that.

On one hand he was fantastic and the other a spastic. You could say he was a fantastic spastic.

I found a rock at the park. I threw it at some orphans.

What would they do? Go to their family?

Any 8 year old: Sus!

Me: Jake, we're at a funeral!

This isn't really a joke, but I HAVE PTSD, YAY! :)

What do you call a cow with no legs?

Grounded beef.

My friend: You're so skinny, you never miss the elevator when it's closing. You just slip right through!😂

Me thinking it's a gift from God: 🕴️😎