Aed

Aed jokes

School Shooter

    • If a school shooter walks into a classroom and shoots an autistic kid, what does the kid say? "Why do I look like Swiss cheese?"

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    • World Trade Center

    • What is something you can’t say in a superhero movie?

    “Is it a bird, is it a plane, well whatever it is, it’s heading straight for the World Trade Center.”

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    • Michael Jackson

    • What kind of club is every parent afraid of their kid joining?

    The Mikey Jackson club.

    How do you spell the name of the most dangerous pedophile?

    M-I-C-H-A-E-L J-O-S-E-P-H J-A-C-K-S-O-N

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    • Stall

    • If a physically handicapped gay white male is sitting on the toilet in the handicapped stall, and if you are a gay white male that is well-endowed that is not physically handicapped, and if you want the physically handicapped gay white male who is sitting on the toilet in the handicapped stall to suck your dick, what do you do to convince him to suck your dick if you have a hard on and your horny as hell?

    Put $25.00 under the handicapped stall before you put your dick under the handicapped stall.

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    • Time Machine

    • If anyone ever makes a time machine, please make a bunker for Hitler/the Nazis and send them to 2050. I want to see who would die first, future us or them.

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    • Domestic Violence

    • I do consider Johnny Depp to be a victim of domestic violence.

    Just like how I consider a children's hospital run by Michael Jackson and a retirement home run by Harold Shipman to be both safe places to be in.

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    • Depression

    • I wondered if becoming a furry could help me escape my crippling depression...

    Unfortunately, the veterinarian insisted that he still wasn't going to euthanize me.

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    • Meth

    • White girl: So this crystal cures my depression and helps me lose weight?

    Me holding a rock of meth: YES!!!

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    • Wizard

    • A woman is on the edge of a bridge, about to commit suicide, when a strange man comes up to her.

    "Tell me, why do you wish to end your life?" he asks in a booming but gentle voice.

    "My children died last year in a car crash, I'm battling depression, my husband left me, and I lost my job," she sobs. "I don't wish to live anymore."

    The man mulls this over, and proclaims, "I will solve all your problems, as I am a wizard and possess unfathomable abilities. However, you must grant me a blowjob first."

    The delighted woman readily agrees, takes him below the bridge, and fulfills his request. After they're done, he asks, "How old are you?"

    "37," she replies, wiping her mouth.

    "You're 37 and you still believe in wizards?"

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