Aed jokes
Two men were bartering over a marble slab. A lot of counter-offers were made.
My mom said the happier a person is when sick, the sooner they get better.
So I went to the hospital, hooked up everyone's breathing masks to laughing gas.
Where's a cannibal's favorite place to eat?
Chili's, because they got them baby back ribs.
What does a glass of water ask a pond?
"Water you doing?"
What does the pond answer?
"Pondering life."
What is the one thing wrong with Asian pet stores?...
There is always a kitchen in the back.
What's worse than Aaron with Down syndrome?
Aaron with a rope.
Why did Brandon's mum chase him with a knife? Because he didn't let her cum first!
What do you get from childhood drama? A ginger with autism.
What's Adam's biggest fear?
Andy with a belt.
What do you get when Glen fucks an orange?
Adam.
What do you call a convict in prison for touching little girls? A boy named Brandon.
Aaron and Ben meet on Grindr. They have a drink and have sex. They wake up in the morning in bed. Aaron says, "I'm so glad I got it out." Ben replies, "What? Oh, just the HIV."
A girl comes home and finds her dad and 4-year-old brother on the sofa. She says, "Dad, why is he wearing that face mask?"
The dad buckles his belt and says, "There's more for you, hunny."
I lost my virginity once and found it in a store being sold off.
What’s the difference between a loser and a paper?
A girl actually dates the paper.
Did you know that there is a new drug on the market for lesbians who are suffering from depression? It's called Trycoxagain.
A foreign man came to America not knowing a word of English and right away began looking for a job. He became a chorus teacher and learned to say, "Mi-mi-mi-mi-mi!" After that he joined the Army and learned to say, "Yes sir!" After that he worked at a restaurant and learned to say, "Forks and knives, forks and knives!" After that he worked at a candy store and picked up the words, "Goody-goody gumdrops!"
A few weeks later, there was a murder in the area and he was the first person to be interrogated by the police. The interrogation went as follows:
Policeman: "Who killed the man?" Foreign man: "Mi-mi-mi-mi-mi!" Policeman: "Did you kill the man?" Foreign man: "Yes sir!" Policeman: "What did you use to kill him?" Foreign man: "Forks and knives, forks and knives!" Policeman: "You're under arrest." Foreign man: "Goody-goody gumdrops!"
What's the difference between a dead baby in a dumpster and a treasure chest? It's a surprise when you find the treasure.
Knock knock.
Boo.
No need to cry, it was only a joke. Yeh, I can't think of anything.
I trained a wolf to meditate, so now she's aware-wolf.