Aed jokes
Who cooks in a lesbian relationship?
Neither one of them, they eat out.
A genealogist looks at the family tree.
A gynecologist looks up the family bush.
What do you do when a woman is choking?
Back up a couple inches.
What does a bridge and a fat chick have in common?
They’ll eventually get laid by a Mexican.
How do you get a black girl to suck your meat?
Put barbecue sauce on it.
Someone asked the former 2016 presidential candidate Hillary Clinton why she lost the 2016 presidential election to Donald John Trump, and the former 2016 presidential candidate Hillary Clinton said, "Because someone asked her what she would do for a Klondike Bar?"
How can a pimp save money in buying condoms for his stable?
Answer: Have his hoes wash and rinse them after every use.
What’s missing from an orphan's iPad?
The home button.
Why don't you have a life?
Because you're ugly.
What does a pregnant slave and a payless sale have in common?
Buy one, get one free.
What do you call a guy that's high in a wheelchair?
A baked potato.
Why does OSHA require women to wear panties?
Because every manhole needs a cover.
I told my mom, "Do you want to see a magic trick?" She said yes. I said, "You are going to have a hot dog and cream pie together." My mom said, "No, I'm not," but I told my mom, "I'm going to need your assistance." First, I need you to lick and suck on my hot dog that is attached to me, which she did. The next minute my mom has a cream pie over her face. Then I told my mom, "You see, you are going to have a hot dog and cream pie together." Then my mom said, "When you are right, you are right."
What does the word circumcise mean?
Cut off a boy's or a man's dick, or cut off a girl's or a woman's foreskin.
You need a good place to think? You can sit on my lap, and we’ll see the first thing that pops up!
Don’t have a bike? You can mount me instead.
Are you a blanket? Because I love it when you’re on top of me.
My two friends came to me one day and said they had the best blowjob that they ever had from my little sister. So I ask my sister, "Is it true that you gave my friends blowjobs?" She said yes.
My sister asked me, "Do you want one?" I said yeah. My sister gave me a blowjob and wow, just like my friends, it was the best blowjob that I ever had. As an older brother, I couldn't be more prouder.
What does a white person say when they're surrounded by black guys? "Hey, who turned the lights out?!"
How do you make a snooker table laugh? Tickle its balls!