Adult Jokes

Why can't a woman find a glory hole inside of the lady's room? Because piss comes out of a woman's pussy

The boss wondered why one of his most valued employees was absent, but had not phoned in.

Needing to have an urgent work problem resolved, he dialed the employee's home phone number and was greeted by a child's whisper, "Hello."

"Is your Mummy home?" he asked.

"Yes," whispered the small voice.

"May I talk with her?"

The child whispered, "No."

Surprised and wanting to talk with an adult, the boss asked, "Is your Daddy there?"

"Yes."

"May I talk with him?"

Again the small voice whispered, "No."

Hoping there was someone with whom he could leave a message, the boss asked, "Is anyone else there?"

"Yes," whispered the child, "a policeman."

Wondering what a cop would be doing at his employee's home, the boss asked, "May I speak with the policeman?"

"No, he's busy," whispered the child.

"Busy doing what?"

"Talking to the ambulancemen and the Fireman," came the whispered answer.

Growing more worried as he heard a loud noise through the earpiece on the phone, the boss asked, "What is that noise?"

"A helicopter," answered the whispering voice.

"What is going on there?" demanded the boss, now truly apprehensive.

Again, whispering, the child answered, "The search team just landed a helicopter."

Alarmed, confused, and a little frustrated, the boss asked, "What are they searching for?”

Still whispering, the young voice replied with a muffled giggle..."Me!"

A girls walks into an Adult Store. "Hi I want to buy that Red Dildo right there"

Cashier: that's a Fire Extinguisher you whore"

👍 👍 👌 👌 👏 🙌 😮 🫢 🤔 💭 💡 🤣 😄 😃 😀 😊 😍 💘 🕳 What is the difference between paying $50.00 to received a anonymous blow job from a physically challenged gay white male who is also a sex worker at a glory hole and paying $175.00 to received a anonymous blow job from a able-bodied bisexual white female who is also a sex worker at a glory hole? If you give $50.00 to received a anonymous blow job from a physically challenged gay white male who is also a sex worker at a glory hole you are saving yourself $125.00 💸 😁

Why do physically challenged gay men suck dick better than females who are able-bodied and heterosexual? Because physically challenged gay men do it best 👏 🙌 👍👍 👌 👌 💪 💪 🥰 😊 😃 😄 😁 😍 💖 ❤️ 💖 ❣️ 💕 💘

The Libertarian Party was founded in 1971 and the Libertarian Party has lost every presidential election since 1972, and according to the Libertarian Party the Libertarian Party is the only political party in the United States that is the party of principle, If the Libertarian Party is the party of principle then why hasn't the Libertarian Party won a presidential election since 1972? Because it is politically motivated 👏 🙌 👍👍👌👌 🤔 💭 💡 🫢 😲 😭 😠 😡 🤬

👨 + 👩 + 👦 + 👬 + 👧 +👭 + 🚻 + 💩 = 🚽 + 💩 + 🚽 = 🪠 💩 + 🪠= 🚽+ 💩 + 🐘 + 💩 + 🚻 + 🚽 + 🪠 = 😭

What is a card carrying lesbian feminist? A carpet muncher who is a card carrying member of the National Organization For Women

What is the difference between the National Organization For Carpet Munchers and the National Organization For Women? The National Organization For Women have more experience in being a carpet muncher because they eat more pussy

If two feminazis are carpet munchers which one in the lesbian relationship cooks? They both don't because both of the carpet munchers are too busy eating each other's pussy 😋 🤪 😌 😏 😜 👍 👍 👌 👌 👏 🏆 🥇 💭 🤔 😮 😁 😊 😃 😄 👌 😍 🥰 ☺️

In a lesbian relationship which feminazi cooks? None both carpetmunchers eat out

Why can't a a citizen in communist china especially a chinese male who is between 18 - 29 years old can not buy a box of condoms in a drug store in communist china? Because the condom would be too big for the penis of chinese men in communist china