
Grown up jokes
Little Jonny just came back from quarantine with his girlfriend, Sally.
They both said they had to go to the bathroom. When they came back, Sally was coughing up a storm. The teacher said, "You need to be quarantined again."
"No," Sally said, "I was just in the bathroom choking on something that grown-ups, especially women, like." Then the teacher faints.
What do you call a grown up with your sister? Your best friend.
What do you call a grown-up orphan? Homeless.
Old woman: You are such a darling child. Please come and see me again next year.
A year later, as child walks up to the door of the old lady's house...
Old woman: Oh my! Goodness sakes, child! Have you grown, or have I shrank???
Child: Both.
You look at it. You tug on it like a shoe string. You play with it like elastic bubble plastic, but it still never grows.
Little Red Riding Hood has to deliver food to her grandma again. She can drive now because she is sixteen. One the way, she accidentally took the wrong way and got to a different forest where her grandma lives now. She found the wrong cottage that looked like her grandma's home. When she opened the door, she found her younger and older sisters of ages 9, 11, 18, and 22. How old is Little Red Riding Hood?
Answer: 16
Hi, oooo was the day I was a kid. I was going home to school today after dinner!
A 10-year-old: "I don't want to smile without having a reason to. People shouldn't think I'm happy 24/7."
A 10-year-old, a week later: "Damn... my life is shitty..."
<2 years later> 12-year-old: "What is de-pre-ssion?" *googles it*
Now 14-year-old: "Oh..."
- Mommy, what will I be when I'm grown up?
- Shut up, Sam, you've got cancer!
Community talk
GENESIS 38 Judah and Tamar 1It happened at that time that Judah went down from his brothers and turned aside to a certain Adullamite, whose name was Hirah. 2There Judah saw the daughter of a certain Canaanite whose name was Shua. He took her and went in to her, 3and she conceived and bore a son, and he called his name Er. 4She conceived again and bore a son, and she called his name Onan. 5Yet again she bore a son, an… Read more
Lyrics She's more than just a pretty face In a late night bar More than just a pair of tight jeans Sitting in your car She's more than a last call kiss Or a one night stand Remember, boy, you weren't the first to hold her hand She's somebody's daughter She's somebody's everything She's somebody's little girl Even if she's grown up and moved away She's somebody's whole world She's somebody's baby And if you don't trea… Read more
