What job lets you kill the most people?
An abortion doctor.
Abortion Jokes
What do you call an abortion in a bathtub?
Chunky Tomato Soup.
Girl: "How do you feel about abortion?"
Dad: "Ask your sister."
Girl: "I don't have a..."
Did you know hospitals have an entire wing for free dead babies? It’s called the abortion center.
Why can't you fool an aborted fetus? Because it wasn't born yesterday.
Stop saying negative shit about dark humor jokes! If it bugs you that bad, then go away! That'll solve everything but world hunger and failed abortion.
What is it called if your mom does not make it to your birth?...
An abortion.
What's the best part of working at an abortion clinic?
Free dog food.
What’s the difference between a mother and a fetus at an abortion office?
Only one of them is scared.
Abortion, it really brings out the kid in you.
Where is the worst place to lock your keys in your car?
The anti-abortion clinic because you have to go back in and ask for a coat hanger.
Why did the goat have an abortion?
Because she already had too many kids!
Did you hear about the unborn fetus? Oh wait, never mind, it must have been aborted from the sight.
Baby > commits start breathing.
Mom > commits abort.
Baby > commits ohshit.exe
So, I was f**king my daughter the other night, and I don’t know what was funnier: the looks on my wife’s face when she walked in on me or the fact that the abortion clinic let me keep her.
What’s the difference between 911 and an abortion?
With 911 there was a victim to tell the tale.
Hey, wanna hear an abortion joke? Never mind, I can't deliver it.
Having an abortion will make you so tired... it literally sucks the life out of you.
What is round and squishy? A dead baby's head.
What’s red, slimy, and makes my wife scream? Two failed abortions!
