Worst Jokes Ever

A priest and a nun are traveling across the desert on a camel, and when all of a sudden the camel dies. They’re in the middle of the desert with no hope of rescue when that night the priest thinks to himself that he can’t die a virgin. He looks over at the nun and pulls out his penis. The nun says, "Father, what is that?" He says, "This, sister, is the wand of life." The nun says, "Good, now go stick it in that camel's ass and let’s get the hell out of here!"

What game does an emo hate the most?

Cut the Rope.

Stop hating on pedos. At least they drive slow in school zones.

What did the doctor say to the Chinese patient? "Sum ting wong."

The only person I'd have a cooking lesson with is Hitler.

Whoever kills Hitler goes to heaven. Oh, wait... nevermind...

What’s similar between the twin towers and Kobe Bryant?

They both can crash down.

So why don’t blind people go sky diving? It scares the hell out of their seeing eye dog.

When does a blind person know when he’s about to hit the ground? The leash goes slack.

In school, we learned that squirrels stick their nuts in trees. So, just like my uncle Dave...

Kenny's favorite part of living in his mom's basement is sleeping with the landlady.

People say killing two birds with one stone is a good thing, but when I did it, people just looked horrified.

Why couldn't Helen Keller eat her Big Mac?

She was too busy trying to read the sesame seeds.

Humanity.

When you go to an orphanage for a field trip: When the workers said, "I remember you as a kid."

What do you call a black man with a gun? A gangsta.

What's the difference between a gay man and a refrigerator?

The fridge don't fart when you take your meat out.

"You look like you've lost some weight."

"Really? Well, whatever weight I lost, you found it, pal!"

What's Michael Jackson's favorite hobby?

Nothing because he's dead.

What do babies and grenades have in common? They both make noise when you throw them.

Dating a stripper is like eating a bag of chips in class.

Everyone looks at you in disgust, but deep down inside they want some too.