Worst Jokes Ever
If Germany is the father land, and Russia is the mother land, would WWII just be domestic violence?
Mr. Smith had four daughters. Each of his daughters had a brother. How many children does Mr. Smith have?
Why was JFK stupid? He only had half a brain.
I am only here because me no like Blues Clues LGBTQ episode as I don’t believe in that. If you do, ok.
And it shouldn’t be a month, the month should be for all of the war veterans, it should be a day for pride. Companies only use this month for money; it’s exploitation because they don’t truly support, unlike me, in which I don’t support it.
It must not be a good suicide story if you can tell it.
Why did the orphan commit mass murder?
To be on top of the wanted list.
I asked Michael Jackson when did he lose his virginity. He just replied with "HEHE!"
The Sunday school teacher is a little concerned that his kids might be a little confused about Jesus, so he asks his class, “Where is Jesus today?”
Little Suzy replies, “He’s in heaven.”
Little Mary replies, “He’s in my heart.”
Little Johnny says, “He’s in the bathroom!”
The teacher says, “How do you know this?”
Then little Johnny says, “Well, every morning my father gets up, bangs on the bathroom door, and yells, “Jesus Christ are you still in there!?””
Pinocchio goes to the doctor for a checkup. When he gets there, the doctor asks him, "Do you have cancer?" Pinocchio replies, "That was very straight up, but no, I’m pretty sure I don’t have cancer." After saying this, his nose grew.
I got my son a trampoline for his birthday.
The ungrateful boy sat in his wheelchair the whole time.
Q: What comes before 47?
A: AK
Being incest isn't that bad. I was fingering my sister, and I found my dad's old wedding ring. Winner winner!
Your mama is so fat, you can't tell if she's pregnant or not.
An apple a day keeps a doctor away... at least if you throw it hard enough.
Some say Stephen Hawking was a genius, but I never heard him say anything intelligent.
A guy walks into a magical forest looking to cut down a tree. The best one he can find is a magical talking tree. He holds his axe up ready to slice and begins to swing when the tree says, "Stop! I'm a magical tree. You can't cut me." "I'm a magical tree!" the man mocks, then as he goes to swing the axe he says, "You may be a magical tree... But you will dialogue!"
What is red and goes 200 miles per hour?
A baby in a blender.
Who is M.J.'s cartoon character?
Muzan Kibutsuji
Hehe
Girl: "When we get married, I want to share all your worries, troubles, and lighten your burden."
Boy: "It's very kind of you, darling, but I don't have any worries or troubles."
Girl: "Well, that's because we aren't married yet!"
A guy took his blonde girlfriend to her first football game. They had great seats right behind their team's bench.
After the game, he asked her how she liked the experience. "Oh, I really liked it," she replied, "especially the tight pants and all the big muscles, but I just couldn't understand why they were killing each other over 25 cents."
Dumbfounded, her date asked, "What do you mean?"
"Well, they flipped a coin, one team got it, and then for the rest of the game, all they kept screaming was, 'Get the quarterback! Get the quarterback!' I'm like, hello? It's only 25 cents!"