Worst Jokes Ever
How many Quebecers does it take to change a lightbulb?
4!
One to hold the bulb, two to turn the chair he's standing on, and one to sing "Alouette, gentille alouette!"
What do you call a dictatorial cow?
Moosilini.
Donald Trump is YEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE!
Why did Sally not save the mountain climber?
Because it was her dad.
What did Sally get for Christmas?
Cancer.
They have a new line of socks for paraplegics.
They are so comfortable they can't even feel them.
You know chords, right? Well, you know what I love to do? To play with A-minor. You know, feel your fingers on A-minor. Gives you a sense of power, to just F A-minor.
But that's not my favorite thing to fiddle with. That would be the D of minors. It's just solid, you know. If you're clever you can have the D of minors into the C of minors. Or, though a bit tricky, the D of minors into the B of minors.
And at this point you've gotten the point and if I want to continue it would be a bit of a stretch.
Life.
I like my women like my coffee—ground up and frozen.
What do you call a funny family of chairs? A sitcom!
I fucked a Pokemon the other day. It is dead now.
What's the hardest part of a vegetable to eat?
The wheelchair.
What's the difference between Arsenal and West Ham?
Arsenal can win trophies and win games.
What did I eat for breakfast yesterday?
10 year olds.
Why did the toilet paper roll down the hill?
Because of gravity.
There was a man in a wheelchair, and he got knocked out in front of a bus. He had a wheelie good life!
What's the difference between Cain Dashiell and Down syndrome?
Nothing.
Why did the chicken cross the road?
Because...
Deutsch: Die, die nichts zu sagen haben, reden viel. Die, die was zu sagen haben, hingegen kaum.
Stephen Hawking is a real stand up guy, out-standing performance.