Worst Jokes Ever
Do you know why Peter Pan is always flying?
Because he Neverlands!
Q: What's the difference between a grandma fetish and necrophilia?
A: A few weeks.
People often ask me what I would do for a Klondike bar. Well, I'd straight up put 5 hijackers on Flight 175 before it departed from Logan Airport at 8:14 a.m. on September 11, 2001.
My wife is not only gone like gonorrhea, she is also gone because of my (and now her) gonorrhea.
I like your mama's big butt, and I cannot lie.
I went to the doctor because I had a steering wheel in my pants, and it was driving me nuts.
I just shed my pants.
Papyrus: Nyhe heh heh! I got a swim suit! And it even says cool dude!
Sans: I guess now it says pool dude ;)
Papyrus: SSSSAAAAANNNNSSSS!
A monk asks the priest if it's okay to kiss a nun.
The priest replies, "Just as long as you don't get in the habit!"
My friend Joe was a great hunter. He always shot like 3 deer every week.
He was even better at school when he bagged 30 of them.
Person: I broke my arm in three places.
Doctor: Well, don't go to those three places then.
The only reason he died was because Virgin Media wifi crashed.
She saw me butt-naked, now she thinks I'm half Black.
Why did Stephen Hawking die?
His wife forgot to plug his wheelchair into the wall.
My marriage was on the rocks, so I buried my wife under some.
Anal, haha.
Hey, I asked for a paper, but I thought it was a cut, but it turns out it was tearable.
Why did Sally fall off the swing?
Because she was in a wheelchair! 🤣🤣
There were 3 guys in detention called Zip, Willy, and Pee, and they were all being naughty. The teacher came in and said, "Zip down, Willy out, Pee in the corner."
Papyrus: Sans, can you call Undyne for me and tell her that I found a human!
Sans: Sure bro, lemme just get on the Tele-bone.
Papyrus: Ssssaaaaannnnsss!!!!!!
Sans: Yea bro.
Papyrus: You know what? I will tell Undyne instead.