Worst Jokes Ever
Why did the beans fuck the mum to make bouncing beans?
Today at the bank, an old lady asked me to help check her balance. So I pushed her over.
Why do you call a pineapple a pineapple?
Because it is a pineapple, pin, apple, apple, pen, doudodo.
What do you call a stupid male Indian?
"Anshu-man."
Why did Steven Hawkins die?
Because he got a virus.
My name.
I comforted my friend about his wife's death, until I found out who did it.
Why couldn't the toilet paper cross the street?
Because it got stuck in a crack.
A blind guy walks into the door of a bar...
That's it... that's the end of the joke.
What's black and white?
History.
What is a skeleton's favorite instrument?
The trom-bone.
Wanna see something dark?
Close your eyes.
What do french fries 🍟 do when they meet?
They ketchup.
A family had a very disobedient dog. It would bite the children’s hands when they pet the animal, the dog would piss on everything, and it would chew their shoes. This is why it was adopted.
Doctor: You don't have long to live. 10...
Patient: Ten what? Ten years, ten months?
Doctor: 9... 8... 7...
Friend #1: "Yo guys, what's the most unfair game you've ever played? For me it's Fortnite."
Friend #2: "I'd have to say Monopoly."
Me: "The most unfair game you say? Life, definitely. Like, no one wins, it's a one-way game."
Friend #2: "Uhh...that's not exactly what he meant..."
Friend #1: *calls the suicide hotline*
I needed to take a phone call, so I went to the nearest exit. I guess you can say it was very exciting! 😂
What do you call an hourglass with no sand in it?
A waist of time.
These jokes make me want to die.
What's yellow and can't swim?
A school bus full of kids drowning.