Worst Jokes Ever

My friend nearly drowned in her bowl of muesli the other day. She was pulled in by a strong "currant."

What fruit is square and green? A lemon in disguise.

What's a vampire's favorite fruit? A neck-tarine.

Why were the apple and orange all alone? Because the banana "split."

What is Saturn's favorite movie?

Lord of the Rings.

You are so fat that Big Chungus looks like a small Chungus.

KK or Liv?

Why does your mom hate you?

Because you are a loser.

Why do white people carry Confederate flags?

To remind us that they are losers.

"I hope my death would make more sense than my life."- Joker

By the way, this isn't a joke or a poem. I just want to say, please check out Gwen's puns. They're good!

What do you call a hippo that has been thrown in a pan?

Hippo-POT-amus!

I am sorry, but I need some text to work with. Please provide the text from the comments section so I can generate the JSON data for you.

Hey you, the person who's scrolling, I know you might have depression and some feel they can't talk to anyone about it, so in the comments please, if you need to talk to others, if you comment about it and say you need to talk to someone, I promise you that I will talk to you. You are not alone, and even though it seems it won't change and get better, it will, I promise.

Please no harsh comments toward each other.

How do you get a Koala to fall asleep?

Sing a koala-by.

Just shit my pants and it ran all down my legs... last time I eat at Popeyes.

Why was the people's wedding so miserable...

'Cause during the kiss someone farted so loud and stinky, they agreed to never try to have another wedding.

How many times can you subtract ten from one thousand?

One; after that you're subtracting ten from 990.

How many times can you subtract 10 from 100?

Once. The next time you would be subtracting 10 from 90.

Bro, you teeth are so yellow that you can't brush your teeth.