911, what's your emergency?
Me: My grandma just passed out in the living room and I think she's dead.
Well, it's not a living room anymore.
Me: Hangs up.
Worst Jokes Ever
Why can't orphans play baseball? Because they don't know where home is.
I smell ice a mile. Titanic, I want to iceberg.
What did Melania ever see in Donald Trump?
$2 billion and high cholesterol.
I was walking home when I saw children crossing the street on their own. I went towards him and tapped his shoulder and said, "Hey, little kid, you are not supposed to be walking on your own." The kid turns out to be a dwarf.
What did the toilet paper say when he got stuck in a crack on the side walk?
"I got stuck in a butt crack!"
Why do science jokes usually get no reaction?
Because they're so boron!
Why can you trust a donut? It tells the hole truth!
Aren't I badly good?
Why can't an orphan play baseball or softball?
They can't find home. 🤣
what's the difference between a feminist and a knife?
one has a point.
Why did the pillow go to court?
Because it had a pillowcase!
A man walked into the kitchen and asked his blonde wife what she was doing. She said, "I'm trying to do this jigsaw puzzle. It's supposed to be a tiger, but all of the pieces are brown." Her husband then said, "Honey, those are frosted flakes."
Your forehead's so big, it's built like Megamind's robot, period.
Why are they called s’mores?
Because you always want another one!
Hi, how are you? Busy, busy today, and I have to...
I love riding my bike 🚲.
Hi, how are you? Busy, busy today and tomorrow. I have to go home from home and walk home. Walk and a bike. Walk, walk, and a bike to school tomorrow night. I have to have lunch with my mom and dad, and I have dinner with you tonight.
I love silly jokes.
What's bad? A nut allergy.