Worst Jokes Ever
A girl asked her mom, "Why is my name Walmart?"
Her dad replied and said, "Because that’s where you were made."
Knock, knock.
Who's there?
IBC.
IBC who?
I'll be seeing you later.
How are orphans like Spider-Man?
No way home.
Your mom is so ugly her face would split in half when she sees you.
Say this to someone who is fat that you don't like (make sure he's a virgin):
"You're so fat you can sell shaaade!! That's why you're a virgin and you masturbaaate!!! Yeah, I've see you, touching your 1 centimetre and if you have a gf she's is a cheater!!"
Make sure to say "shaaade" not "shade". And say "maturbaaate" (also try to say a D not a T in maturbaaate) not "masturbate".
Yo mama's so poor, she can't even afford to pay attention.
Don't you find it ironic that Kobe Bryant bounced his helicopter off the ground like a basketball?
My wife said, "Why oh why have you ordered carpet, our house is lovely?"
Thankfully the carpet was put to good use in the end, no more stupid comments coming from a rolled up Emily in the bottom of the ocean!
My wife saw me hit the best drive yesterday with my golf clubs.
I must have drove that chihuahua 300 yards.
What has 15 arms, 9 legs, 8 heads, and 12 eyeballs?
A mosque after a missile strike.
Why shouldn't you say "I hate you" to your parents?
Ask an orphan.
Your forehead's so big, when you were being born, the doctors thought you had no face.
What's an orphan's least favorite joke?
Yo mama!
If I don't get a bf by the end of this month, Christmas lights won't be the only thing hanging from the roof.
A teacher walked up to me and said, "How did we get butt cracks?"
I was like 4, so I said, "You had an earthquake on your booty."
Bootylicious lol
A butt saw the toilet and said, "Shit, I'm sick!"
What's brown and sticky?
A stick. Get your head out of the gutters... Jeez!
Why would a Italian heterosexual male do for $100.00 if he was a prostitute that a polish american male would only do for a Klondike bar if he was a prostitute?
suck a big cock.
Jantje goes on a walk with his grandmother. Jantje sees 1 dollar on the street and picks it up.
The grandmother says: "Hey, Jantje! No picking up things from the floor! They are ugly and bad!"
Then they keep walking. The grandmother slips and asks Jantje to help her stand up. Jantje answers: "No! Everything on the ground is ugly and bad."
Me: You know your parents were very good people.
Orphan: Wow, I didn’t know that.
Me: I know, you're an orphan.