Worst Jokes Ever

1+1=3, just add 9 months.

What's the difference between emos and 9/11?

The emos are still there, high up off the ground.

Teacher says, "Okay class, today we're gonna talk about what everyone wants to be when they grow up." Little Johnny, how about you go first."

Little Jonny: "I want to be a speed bump when I grow up!"

Roses are red, Violets are blue, I thank God I'm not as ugly as you.

Why do animals in polar regions have thick fur? Because they don't have a barber! 🤣 🤣 🤣

How many Alzheimer's patients does it take to change a light bulb?

To get to the other side.

Orphan: I love abcdefu!

Caretaker: Why? You don't have anyone to flip off.

Why do emo kids not run? Because their bodies will tear apart from the bones from all the cuts.

What should you never say to a Japanese person? "You're da bomb!"

Teacher said, "You never do your homework," so I shot her 7 times with a M1 BushDid911 and replied, "It's all in my backpack, can you grade it please?"

How do you turn rape into no rape? Steal her bank details for money transfer.

Boy: Hello, Mom, can I have $50?

Mom: Does it look like I am made of money?

Boy: That's what M.O.M. means, right?

I put on my hazmat suit, and grabbed my equipment, and said, "My time to shine!"

An anti-bullying PSA and speeding PSA from the same creator meet one another.

The death toll went sky high.

My teacher said, "Words don't hurt!"

So I threw my dictionary at her.

"Among Us" is basically a game about betrayal.

Noose: "Hey man, wanna hang out?"

Corpse: "Sorry man, I'm dead inside."

Women say men are trash.

Yet men made the phone, laptops, computer and electrical hardware she uses to say men are trash, never mind the electricity she uses to power those devices...

What has eyes but can't see?

Potatoes, storms, and needles.

What do you call a woodpecker without a beak?

A headbanger.