I'm not looking for consent, I'm looking for cooperation!
Worst Jokes Ever
Name one person who would take an orphan?
Michael Jackson, so they can play all night.
I'm not suicidal, I'm just speedrunning life.
What's the difference between intelligence and apathy?
I don't know! I don't care!
Michael Jackson.
Michael Jackson gets really ill, so he's rushed to hospital. When they get there, he says, "Am I in heaven?"
The doctor replies, "Nah, sir, we're just taking a quick shortcut through the children's ward."
Don't you just hate it when you're the first one to fall asleep at a sleepover, and then you hear, "Prank em, John?"
What’s the only long-lasting thing from China?
Covid.
"Oh, waiter! Waiter!"
"Yes, sir?"
"Do you have frog's legs?"
"Why, yes."
"Good. Now hop along and get me a steak!"
What borders on stupidity?
Canada and Mexico.
When a woman decides to abort, it is called a decision, but when I run my truck into a playground of kids, it is called murder.
Little Johnny went on a camping trip. All the tents were taken, so he shared with the teacher. So Little Johnny says: "Can I play with your bellybutton? My mom always lets me when we camp." So the teacher says: "Sure." 5 minutes later the teacher says: "Woah, woah, woah that's not my bellybutton!" Little Johnny says: "Woah, woah, woah, that's not my finger."
How do you make rape funny? Tickle her while you do it.
Yo mama's so fat that when she went sky diving, she caused another global extinction.
Why do we not have female magicians? Because last time we had them, we burned them alive.
Always breathing down my neck, my vampire girlfriend does not give me any space.
Why did Trump go to Jeffrey's secret Island?
So he could trump that little bitch!
Why did Texas freeze to death? Because they're retarded.
What are Michael Jackson’s sexual pronouns? Hee hee!
What is Michael Jackson's favorite planet? Uranus.
