Worst Jokes Ever

Worst Jokes Ever

Your mama is so fat, it said "To be continued..." then it loaded and said "One person at a time!"

What is the difference between a priest and a zit?

The zit waits until you're twelve to come on your face.

I found an alien in my backyard. I put him to work. He went to a farm, and I never saw him again. Moments later, he is on the Daily Planet acting as a reporter. A green rock smashed my house. I called him back, and he passed out.

I remarked, "You lazy!"

Someone locked me out of my house today... At least the children in my basement aren't my problem anymore.

My Crandall just be smashing more than you ON DA GIRLS, and he was slapping your girl last night harder than WILL at the OSCARS! ;)

When a person yells, just laugh and remember that they can’t hurt what’s already dead.

When the people that see you cry, that doesn't mean they miss you. That mean they scared of your onion breath! 🐑💨

Just letting you know if people cry when they see you, that doesn't mean they miss you. That means they're scared of your onion breath.

So my ex, who wouldn't leave me alone because she thought I was the best person in the world even though Will has a better haircut than me, but anyway, when we broke up she said I was the worst person she ever met, and I told her she looks like a cross between a beaver and a mole rat.

Then I told her she has the Wendy's logo haircut and then some other things I'm not gonna say. 2 years of bullshit, I was done.

Anyways, she cried lol.