Taking an emo kid grocery shopping does have its perks.
You get to scan their wrists for discounts!
Worst Jokes Ever
I ear ass your dad's ass and he likes it.
You're so poor, when a robber robs your house, they feel bad for you and just leave.
Your mum is so fat she sat on Walmart and lowered the prices.
Where did the orphans go when the orphanage blew up?
Everywhere...
I couldn't find my cat, and then my pillow started meowing.
"I’m on a hunt for my wife’s murderer, have been for years."
"Oh my God! Your wife’s been murdered?!"
"No no, you misunderstand. I’m still looking for him."
When a woman removes polish with chemicals, no one bats an eye.
But when Hitler removes the Polish with chemicals, everyone loses it...
Why can't an orphan be gay?
They don't have anyone to call "daddy."
Why don't you take emo skydiving?
They cut the rope.
How do pedophiles get kids to suck their d**k?
They spray paint it like candy 🍬.
Why do terrorists like the Twin Towers?
It's the next thing they blow up.
Bully: Your mom hates you.
Orphan: I don't have parents ;)
Depression: Here, your mom just died.
Me: My mom is already dead.
My friend told me to make more friends, so I joined a suicide cult.
I’ll be hanging with them for a while.
The first thing the emo did at the party is to pin the gun to their head.
My wife said she would slam my head into my keyboard if I did not get off video games.
But don't worry I think she was just joking.
Do you know Joe?
Joe mama, mama, a, a, mama, a, a, amam.
A policeman once said, "I will never forget 9/11."
I said, "I hope not, that’s your phone number!"
Blitz: "HOLD ON! You better move that pussy wagon right now, or I’m gonna..."
Vortex: "You'll do what?"
Blitz: "Or I'll... uh... uh, I- I'll call HR!"
*Silence, then Verosika/me, Blitz, and Vortex bust into laughter. And then back to seriousness*
Verosika/me: "Anyway, meet my new Hellhound... Vortex. Unlike you, he actually does his job well." *leaves and flips Blitz off* "Ta-ta fuck stain."
