I got in trouble at school today because I played the knife game with a pair of scissors, but I couldn't flip them off because I was missing that finger.
Worst Jokes Ever
I got in trouble today because I threw a lamp at the emo kid and said, "Lighten up!"
I asked the emo kid how it was hanging. He didn't reply because the rope was too tight.
How to make white ice cream red... blend a baby into it!
Today I was asked what I wanted to be, and I said I wanted to be a pinata because I want to be hanged.
"I wish I was either Christmas lights or a mistletoe."
"Why?"
"Because I want to hang!"
🗣: "Stop making suicide jokes!"
"Don't worry bro, I'll end it soon."
What's the difference between Freddie Mercury and Princess Diana?
Freddie lived long enough to be a Queen.
If Shaq had a boat, he would name it "Freethrow," because he would never sink it.
What did the fat guy say when he fell off the ladder? "Catch me!"
Why did the dick suck my ass? They died.
Give a blind kid a gun and tell him it's a hair dryer.
Why couldn't the orphan watch Spiderman? He couldn't find his way home.
Don't worry, the forehead jokes were recommended just like your hairline.
I hate family reunions. I see too many of my exes there.
If I was an object in this world, I’d be a glass! Because if you leave me when I’m too close to the edge, I will likely shatter and break.
I'm still wondering who took Jesus' sandals.
Even the one who ate that dove that sat at Jesus' shoulder. 🤔
When we talk of our X, some people talk of their XXX. 🤣
"Chelsea is the most consistent team.
One win in August, one win in September, and one win in October; it's just like a menstrual cycle.
If they don't win in November, just know that they're pregnant." 😅
Having cockroaches in the house is a sign that you've food.
These things are like Ugandan girls, they hate poverty.
