911 jokes
Balls.
Two hunters are walking in the forest together. Hunter #2 flops down, unconscious, and Hunter #1 dials 911.
Operator: "911, what's your emergency?"
Hunter no. 1: "The other hunter, hunting with me in the woods, fell asleep."
Operator: "Check if he's/she's (not assuming genders) dead."
*Operator hears a distant gunshot*
Hunter no. 1: "What do I do next?"
What does a 911 call receiver say when they get a call?
"9 Juan Juan, who this?"
On 9/11, the Twin Towers ordered 3 pepperoni pizzas. One came in plain, the other came in late, the third went to the wrong address.
Someone threw a cup at my eye. I told 911 that I was mugged.
Why were the Twin Towers mad? They ordered pepperoni pizza, and all they got was plane.
Suicide bombers, carry bombs and remember to breathe.
666 + 420 + 911 + 21 = ?
Do it in calculator.
One day I saw my friend in a hospital bed. He told me to call 911. Instead, I called his parents.
It was September 10, 2001, when I stayed up watching TV shows.
I woke up late for work at The World Trade Center, but it was burning. I said out loud, "I was late! I'm happy I was late to work! I mean... I could've di-" I was then beaten and bruised by the emergency services.
Why can't a blonde call 911?
She can't find the 11.
Never joke about 9/11, they'll just crash and burn.
What's good about 9/11? It helped solve the world's overpopulation issue.
What’s the difference between 911 and an abortion?
With 911 there was a victim to tell the tale.
Why were the people during 9/11 mad because they ordered pepperoni sandwiches, but they got two planes?
Why were the people in the Twin Towers upset? They ordered pepperoni pizza, but instead they got plane.
C'mon guys, 9/11 jokes are just plane wrong.
Osama Spin Laden, dropping beats like the twin towers.
9/11
What is the difference between McDonald's and 9/11?
McDonald's has a drive-through. Twin Towers has a fly-through.