3 jokes

Roast

  • Becky: Rob, you're so stupid! Anything that you say is stupid!

    Rob: .....BECKY :3

  • 0
  • Toilet

  • Fat jokes and mom jokes😂

    1. So fat when she sat on the toilet, she said, "A B C D E F G, get your fat ass off me."

    2. So fat, your dad and her were in bed and tried to kiss. He’d have to slap her belly and ride the third wave up.

    3. Yo mama so fat that when she went to Japan in a green bikini, they all started yelling, "Godzilla, Godzilla."

    4. Your mama’s so fat when she went bungee jumping, she broke the bridge!

    5. Bill was so fat when he stepped on the scale, it said "to be continued."

    6. Yo mama so fat, she put on her lipstick with a paint-roller.

  • 2
  • Little Johnny

  • President Joe Biden was jogging through some different jogging paths around this great county we live in and was jogging through Alabama and fell off into a swamp filled with killer alligators, and these 3 boys named Willie, Roman, and Little Johnny saw him fall in and jumped in and drug him to safety, and the president was like "Thank you, thank you, thank you SOOO much. I'm gonna give you boys a reward for saving my life," and asks them what their names were and what they wanted. The first boy said, "My name's Willy, and I want to go to Disneyland," and the president said, "No problem, and I'll take you personally." The 2nd boy said, "My name's Roman, and I want an autographed pair of Air Jordan Nikes," and the president said, "No troubles at all," and the 3rd boy says, "My name's Little Johnny, and I want a power wheelchair with an awesome stereo and killer wheels," and the president says, "You don't look handicapped, Little Johnny," and Little Johnny said, "I'm not, but as soon as I tell my parents who I saved, I will be"🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣

  • 1
  • Fish

  • There were 3 Gay Fish in a Tank. One says to the others: "How do you drive this thing?"

    Like this joke if you LOLed! 🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣

  • 1
  • Wish

  • An ugly, poor teenage girl found a genie lamp in her backyard. The genie said, "I will grant you 3 wishes, but under 1 condition."

    "What is it?" she asked.

    "After I grant your final wish, you have to have sex with me," the genie replied.

    "Okay, for my 1st wish, I wish to be the prettiest girl at my school," the genie snapped his fingers and made her pretty.

    "For my 2nd wish, I wish for my family to be rich," the genie snapped his fingers and told her her family is now the richest in town.

    "And your final wish?" the genie asked.

    "I wish I had a sabertoothed vagina."

  • 1
  • Prank

  • Hey guys, the prank for today is when I lied about feeling sick so I wouldn't have to go to school.

    Introduction: This prank was committed a week ago! Around 5:00 a.m. in the morning!

    1. I got out some eggs, milk, salt, and a little bit of mashed olives... well those are the main ingredients.

    2. I mixed it all up for about 2 mins just to make it look really like barf...no going to school today!

    3. I put it under the sofa just to give it some solid scent to it.

    4. I fixed my breakfast eggs and bacon. Then when my mom comes down I...PULL OUT MY FAKE BARF!!!!! News flash make a fake excuse for her to leave! My excuse is "I need something its in my room I don't want to get cause it would waste time".

    She fell for it. Then I pull out my FAKE barf which looks like real barf. Then you say or I said "Mom I don't feel so good"! News flash: Don't over sell it think about all that boring school work! and guess what she fell for it so I spend all day doing nothing...absolutely nothing!

    Well that's the prank. Anymore pranks you want ask me in the comment section! Byeeeeeeeeeee

    Number

  • We all know the joke: Why is 6 scared of 7? Because 7 8 9.

    But do you know why 9 is scared of 7?

    Because you are supposed to eat 3 square meals a day (3 squared).

    Pregnancy

  • So you decide one day to ask your son if he wants to f**k, do you do it for 3 hours, then you realize how will I explain another pregnancy to my sterile husband?