There are a lot of upsides to being an orphan.
For one, you never have to worry about your jokes being family friendly.
Worst Jokes Ever
What do you call a wizard who can't secure a girl? Fumbledore.
What did the wizard say when he was filling up the gas tank? "Expensive Petroleum!"
Yo mama is so fat, she falls off both sides of the bed.
What's the difference between milk and my dad?
Nothing, I apparently am allergic to both because I never see either of them.
Fat kids are so fat, they have their own gravitational pull.
Accounting Chapter 12: Long-term Liabilities (FULL TEXT)
Everybody is talking about Trump having leaks in his office.
I don't see what the problem is. He should just use a better fitting diaper next time.
A: What did the lawyer say to the amputee?
Q: You haven't got a leg to stand on.
Remember, children, when you're hungry at 3:00, cook forks for 10 minutes, ok?
What's the difference between my dad and milk? There is no difference; they both left.
A: What did the podiatrist say to the double amputee?
Q: Sorry, but I can't help you.
What show has something orphans will never have?
American Dad!
Katy Perry can't sing, can't dance, doesn't write music, is unbelievably ugly, and is unable to decipher maths or science. Really though, I didn't realize going down on a record executive would later lead her to be one of the people able to go to space.
Q: What's the difference between a CEO and a beer can?
A: Beer cans don't bleed when they get shot.
If an Indian kid is conceived in incest, would that make them OMbred?
Why can't fat kids change a tire?
They would eat the donut.
Q. What do Danielle Smith and a squirrel have in common?
A. They both always have a mouth full of nuts.
Little Johnny goes to his mum and asks, "Mummy, what's rape?"
Little Johnny's mum answers, "The way you got here."
"When I heard that not arguing or fighting in a relationship represents a lack of interest, that's when my girlfriend started missing her makeup box."
