Yours jokes

A kid gets home from school and finds his mom and dad having sex. The kid asks, "What are you doing, Dad?" The dad replies, "Having sex with your mom, son," and he starts laughing.

The next day, Dad gets home from work and finds his son having sex with his nan. The dad shouts, "What the hell are you doing, son?" The kid replies, "It's not funny when it's your mom, is it?"

You're so fat, astronomers discovered a planet larger than Earth but smaller than Uranus.

your mom

I would make a rape joke, but I'd have to force it down your throat.

Doctor: "You're as healthy as a horse!"

Jimmy: "That's great!"

Doctor: "A horse with cancer."

Q: What's the hardest thing about losing your virginity?

A: Making sure she doesn't wake up.

The bushes outside got jealous after they saw your eyebrows.

When your girlfriend has an abortion, it's kinda like dodging your own bullets.

My handicapped friend was getting bullied. I said, "Just stand up for yourself!"

Your forehead is so big, your mom spent half of the time in the delivery room giving birth to just your head.

"The problem is not the problem. The problem is your attitude about the problem." - Jack Sparrow

What's your favorite color of the alphabet? True or false?

Knock knock.

Who's there?

Apaches.

Apaches who?

Apaches on your eye.

Me: Your ugly...

Person: I'm not your mirror...

Me: I never told you to be my mirror :p

What's red and really bad for your teeth? A brick.

Is it necrophilia if they die while you're having sex and you just don't realize?

That's what happened to my dog.

Did anyone get my joke? It probably flew over your heads, oops I meant through.

You realize you're in a paradox until you die. You'll see yourself die by murder, suicide, old age, etc.

Then you realize you're dreaming, but you realize that if you die in a dream, you die IRL.

There's something on your chin. No, not that one, the third row.

"Your pussy is sweeter than Mom's," Brother admired his sister.

"I know," replied Sister. "Father told me too."