Yours jokes

What is the difference between your dad and a boomerang? The boomerang comes back.

Your hairline is so far back Trump was ashamed.

If your sister steps on your toe, what will you call it?

Who's in my ass?

Your sister.

Why are uncles like curries?

Because bad ones hurt your asshole.

Is your hairline and forehead old friends, because they go wayyyy back?

You're so ugly when a pig saw you, he said, "Yes, my brother is back."

Your mum is so fat that when she walked past the television, I missed a whole series of SpongeBob.

Your hairline is so long they mistake your forehead for a football field.

Your mom is so fat that when she went to the dentist, the man said, "One at a time."

Friend 1: Did you?

Depressed friend 2: I didn't!

Friend one: Swear on your life!

Depressed friend 2: I swear.

A week later friend 2 dropped dead to their utter delight.

Your hairline goes so far back that Crown Burger was Crown Sandwiches.

Your hairline is so far back, even Shaggy and Scooby ran away!

What do you do when your man doesn't like fruit jokes?

Let the mango.

Your girlfriend/boyfriend says: "I'm dating your uncle..." You start crying and you look under the bed and your uncle says: "Damn."

God needed an extra two hands to make your fat ass of a mother.

Kid: Which were me, are your parents?

Orphan: What are parents?

I didn't break my back in the accident, thankfully.

But I can break yours today, hopefully.

Roses are red. Violets are blue. Your wife needs Jon Grudon, too.

Pilot: So Kobe, it seems like you’re not going to make it to your destination in time, so I’m going to put it on autopilot so I can find a place to fill with gas.

Kobe: Take us to the side of that mountain at full speed. I don’t really want to go to the event anymore.