Yours jokes

I'm gonna blow out your lungs faster than Joe Biden thinks is possible with a 9mm.

Kid me: I lost my stick.

Teacher: No, you didn’t.

Kid me: How do you know that?

Teacher: It’s hanging out of your pants.

A man walks into a doctor's office, naked and wrapped in Glad Wrap.

The doctor replies with: "I can clearly see your nuts."

Your mom is so old that her birth certificate says "expired."

Your mum's so fat, I took a picture of her last Christmas and it's still printing.

How did the emo kid compliment the other emo kid? He said, "I like your cuts G."

You're so fat that when you went outside, you broke the 2-meter rule for COVID.

I hope both sides of your pillow are warm tonight.

Your hairline is so deep that we measure it in metres.

Wife: [Looks] in the mirror. Wife: I look fat, can you say something positive? Husband: At least your eyes work.

Hii! Oh my gosh. It has been forever! How have you guys been? Comment your favorite movie!!!! <3

Your hairline and the universe have one thing in common: they’re yet to be discovered.

911 what's your emergency?

"Burning in toaster."

"Toast?"

"Yeah so your calling 911 because of burnt toast?"

"Set fire to my forest!"

Your mother's hairline is sooooooo long cause Dora the Explorer could not explore it.

Yo mama so fat, when she jumped in the ocean, the whales said, "We are family, even though you're fatter than me!"

Your hairline was so fat that Joe Biden could not make it prime minister.

Your dad's hairline was so long that he died.

Your hairline is gone because you never bathed or brushed.

When you're bored, punch an orphan. What are they gonna do? Tell their mummy?

I saw a girl crying. I told her, "Where are your parents?" She cried more after that. I got kicked out of the orphanage.