Yours jokes
Ex Of Johnnys: I have a question.
Johnny: What?
Ex Of Johnnys: Am I pretty?
Johnny: Yes ofc jesus made everybody wonderfully!
Ex: Awhh!
Johnny: But whoever made you was painting Thomas the Train while making your face.
A girl did squats everyday with a 20 pound weight in her hand to finally text her boyfriend, "Show me your dick now!"
Bob: What is the percent of people who are depressed?
Me: If you're only counting me, 100%.
Your life can't be a joke; a joke has meaning.
Popular guy in class: I am so funny.
Me: Your parents are funny as they made a joke and people are still laughing at it.
Little William punched Little Johnny in the face. Then Little Johnny says, "If you do that again, I'm gonna turn your fucking nuts into coconut juice."
Why are you so fat? I bet you take after your mom more.
What do you call a cow with two legs?
Answer: Your mom.
Your Mom so fat that she went on to commit suicide, but the roof fell off.....
Bully: How is your girlfriend?
Me: I don't have one!
Bully: I know!
Me: How are your parents?
*Walks out of orphanage*
A guy sees a kid crying, and the guy walks up to the kid and asks, "Where are your parents?"
God, I love working at an orphanage!
A homeless kid walked up to another kid and said, "I have what you don't." He said, "(Parents)."
And the kid said, "Your right, I do have parents," and walked away.
Orphanage kid: You’re ugly!
Kid with mother: Your mom!
Your mom's so fat that One Punch Man had to take two punches.
You are so fat that the waiter said to you every time: "Sorry for your weight" instead of "Sorry for the wait."
What is an orphan's least favorite show? “How I Met Your Mother.”
Your hairline is so far back you ain't got a fo'head, you got a five head!
Hello my fellow Canadians, I mean Americans. I, your cool and hip president, has decided to give everyone free ice cream! Even the Russians. Go out to your local ice cream shop and make sure to leave your kids at home!
Pickup lines in 2022 are like: "Are you Russia? Because your bombs are so big!"
A priest walked in and said to the kids,
"Hey kids, are you ready for your faptism?"