You're jokes

Your forehead is so big that it couldn’t handle an acute angle.

Your forehead is so big even Mega Mind knew you were smarter.

Your mama is so fat that when she fell, I didn't laugh, but the concrete cracked up.

The quiet kid's dad dies. You go, "Knock knock."

"Who's there?"

"Not your dad."

Then he says, "What comes after 47?"

The quiet kid says, "AK."

Your forehead is so big that it was used as a billboard.

Your forehead is so big you can smoke a cigar in the rain.

Your mama so fat, she walked by a TV and missed eight episodes.

Why do sisters hate you?

Because you're their favorite stepbrother :P

"My dick fell off in the shower!" suddenly a bright flash of white lights. You see God smiling at you. "Joseph, where is your wiener, little one?" He says, chuckling lightly.

Roses are red, violets are blue, she is hot, but you're as ugly as poo.

Knock, knock. Who's there? Susan. Susan who? Season your chicken, it's too plain!

What do you call a man that has no arms, no legs, and sits in front of your door? Mat.

What do you get when Cayden steals your sandwich? A knuckle sandwich.

My wife and I have reached the decision that we do not want children.

If anyone does, please comment your contact details and we can drop them off tomorrow.

The girl asks her boyfriend, "Are you jealous of my heart?"

He says, "No."

She says, "Because it's pumping in me and you're not."

"Pull down your pants, pull out my willy, stir your guts round like a hot bowl of chili."

You're so cool that celebrities take pictures of you.

You're so brilliant and bright that the Sun wears sunglasses when you're near!

What does a blowjob and a bonus check have in common?

Someone’s always willing to blow your bonus.

There are a lot of upsides to being an orphan.

For one, you never have to worry about your jokes being family friendly.