You're

You're jokes

Your mom is so old, she walked into an antique store and they kept her.

Your mom is so dumb, she called me asking for my phone #.

Two windmills stand at a farm. One asks the other, "What is your favorite kind of music?"

The other windmill replies, "I'm a huge metal fan!"

Quote of the day:

Just one small positive thought in the morning can change your whole day.

[Comment your favorite fall beverage!]

How do you cut your grass without a lawn mower?

You dye it blue and it will cut itself.

How do you cut your grass without a lawnmower?

You dye it blue and it will cut itself.

Sister: Wanna know the difference between your singing and your flute playing?

Me: Sure... (Expecting a completely different response than what I get.)

Sister: Nvm, they have no difference.

Me: *Confused*

Sister: They're both horrible.

What's the difference between a priest and SpongeBob?

SpongeBob asks if you're ready first.

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  • Your hairline legit looks like the Himalayan mountain range, except you need binoculars to find it.

    This Native American won't stop talking bad about me, so I said, "Please stop acting like you first discovered this land belonged to your ancestors!"