Your mom

Your mom jokes

Flower

9 views ·

This joke's about flowers, the blue one's a violet.

Your mom's the Twin Towers and I am the pilot!

Mom

4 views ·

Your mom is so fat that when God said, "Let there be light," he asked your mom to move out of the way.

Time

9 views ·

Bully: I wouldn't bother wasting my time on a shit person like you.

Me: At least I have a brain unlike you.

Bully: Well at least I have a mom unlike you.

Me: Well your mom is so fat that she got stuck in her car and started bleeding Nutella?

Bully: How would you know that?

Me: Because she told me herself.

Bully: How exactly?

Me: She's on the phone right now.

Phone: *High pitched animal noises*

Me: Told you so!

Orphan

3 views ·

Why do orphans that go to their friend's house get this reaction from the friend's mom:

"Go back to your house, it's late." "Finn, wait, can I have your mom's phone number?" "Finn, wait, aren't you an orphan?" "Wait, don't you have a phone, Finn?" "Wait, I forgot, you don't have a phone because nobody wanted to get you a phone or to get you."

Ugliness

42 views ·

You're so ugly your mom and dad abandoned you, and you went to the adoption center, and not even the adoption center would take you or let you in.

Name

If you have a twin sister, do you have the same name? Only if your mom and dad give you the same name.