Yo mama is so ugly I heard that your dad first met her at the pound.
You call your dad the sun because he is 90 million miles away.
How can you tell it's a gay barbecue?
'Cause all the hot dogs taste like shit.
Your eyebrows run away like your dad.
Guy 1: Hey, can you stop making 9/11 jokes? My dad died during it.
Guy 2: Sorry, I will stop. What was your dad?
Guy 1: The pilot. He saw a KFC and wanted it, so, well, you know.
Yo mama is so fat your dad could never get away.
Your dad died of hunger on the journey to find the milk.
Mom, how were hoomans made? Son, it’s because Adam and Eve were brought down by God and made babies!
Dad, how were hoomans made? Son, us humans evolved from monkeys!
Mom, Dad said hoomans were evolved from monkeys, is that true? Oh son, (ruffles smol man’s hair) your dad was telling you his side of the family, and I was telling my side :)
Hey Siri, where is my dad?
Your dad is in a strip club in Las Vegas.
HAH, jokes on you! My dad’s in the kitchen!
Your mom’s husband is in the kitchen, your dad is in a strip club in Las Vegas.
...WhAT-
Did you know your dad was a magician? He disappeared the second he saw your ugly ass face!
Your mom disrespected your dad when he saw your face.
Queen Elizabeth came back before your dad did.
Your eyebrows are far from home just like your dad.
Your dad left for the milk because of your Mcdonalds hairline
Mom: That's why your dad left you.
Me: Why?
Mom: I mean look at you, depressed, suicidal, and unhappy, always anxious, and other mental health issues.
Me: How is that my fault? You are a rude mom!
Mom: Your dad had a heart attack two weeks before you were born, because you are ugly!
(This actually did happen in real life.)
Your mama's so young your dad went to jail.
I swear, if I compared the size of your mother and multiplied it by the time your dad was gone, it wouldn't even be close to your hairline.
Your hairline goes back to when your dad left you.
Your mama is so stupid.
Your dad said, "You're driving me crazy," so your mom handed him the keys and said, "You can drive."
Your mama is so ugly! It took your dad 15 years to return from getting milk.
