You jokes
My wife caught me one day for watching a porn channel, so I quickly turned the TV to a fishing channel. On her way out, she said: "You should stay on the porn channel. You know how to fish!"
I told my dad I was self harming. The next day we talked about it and he said, "Hey you should CUT it out." It was funny but I couldn't bring myself to laugh at that.
Do you have dark humor?
Actually, never mind. I was going to tell you a joke about babies dying... but I decided to abort.
Would you like to try African food?
They would too.
You wanna hear a suicide joke? Nvm, it didn't make it.
Memes
What do you call an orphan's family tree? A stump.
When you send nudes to your Roblox gf and your uncle’s phone sounds with a text tone...
I saw a man sitting on the ledge of a bridge the other day, and asked him what was wrong. He responded with nobody loves me, so i told him that may be true but you dont wanna kill yourself you want to die of old age, or at least be murdered, suicide is for the weak. he responded with your right so I pushed him over the bridge, and he died of murder
I have 206 bones in my body, but when I look at you, I have 207.
Like if you think I'm stupid.
When someone calls you, say this: "Hi, welcome to Dave’s Orphanage. You make them, we take them. How may I help you?"
If you had 10 chicken nuggets and Jimmy tried to steal one, what would you have?
10 chicken nuggets and a dead Jimmy.
Did you know that Germany came up with sparkling water?
Who else would think of adding gas?
how do you fit 4 gay guys on a stool?
you flip it over.
Remember, if you are suffering from paranoia...
You are not alone.
A man went to the library and asked for a book about suicide. The librarian said, "Go away, you won’t bring it back."
Me: Mom, I'm tired.
Mom: "Then go to sleep."
Me: No, you don't understand-
To the guy in the wheelchair who stole my camouflage jacket... You can hide, but you can't run.
Leave a like down below if you think Stephen Hawking should stand for the National Anthem.
When you die, people cry and wish you to come back.
But when you do, people scream and run away.