You jokes

Knock

Knock knock.

Who's there?

Orange.

Orange who?

Orange you glad I didn't make a 9/11 joke?

Speed Bump

You know that feeling when you're going through a school parking lot and go over a speed bump, then you realize that there are no speed bumps?

Trash

Boy/girl: I love you.

Me: I love me too! But sorry, my mom said I can't date trash. Go back to the trashcan.

The boy/girl: I- *Is depressed*

Orphan

Teacher: Students, tomorrow bring your parents to the open house.

Student one orphan: I don't have any.

Student 2: What is the difference between you and an escaped prisoner?

Student one orphan: What!

Student 2: The prisoner gets picked.

Life

Listen, my friends say I am gay, but I tell them I am not because I am not happy. In fact, I have no life. You are my friend. I trust you with my life. Now, can you take it?

Memes

Nut

Brother: Your nuts!

Sister: What do you mean? You're the one that has the nuts!

Bean

Q: What do you call brown mixed with yellow?

A: Someone who just ate beans.

Candy

Boy: "Mister, can I get candy?"

Mister: No, you shit head.

Boy: Why? :(

Mister: Because I'm not your dad.

Kick

What will happen if someone kicks you right in the balls?

You will be like, "Ow, my nuts!"

Rope

How do u get a depressed person out of a tree?

You cut the rope they hung themself in...

Roadkill

What do you call an idiot who walks on the road when cars are coming?

Fresh roadkill.

Baby

How many babies does it take to paint a wall?

Depends how hard you throw them.

Baby

Hey, I broke up with your girl.

-Me: What? Why?

Wait, what?

-Me: You f**ked her, so it's your baby.