You jokes

God

    • If you argued that God was a woman, 49.8% of the US population would try and raise Hell.

    Just to ask the other guy.

    Talk about a male supremacist religion.

    Condom

    • What are four ways a condom is like a Republican elephant?

    1. It stands for inflation.

    2. It limits production.

    3. It encourages cooperation.

    4. It gives you a feeling of security even though you know you're being screwed.

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    • Cheetah

    • Did you hear about the cheetah who robbed a bank? He ran away so fast he almost got away with it, but he was spotted.

  • 2

    • Man

    • "Brown bear, brown bear, what do you see?" I see a blind man looking at me.

    "Blind man, blind man, what do you see?"

    Oh sorry, I forgot you can't see.

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    • FBI

    • My mom is in the FBI. My dad is in the FBI. My sister is in the FBI. My brother is in the FBI. And do you know what I am?

    Divorced.

    Insult

    • "Hey, kid, why are you so fat?"

    "Why did you insult him? That's not nice."

    "It won't matter, he's deaf."

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    • Girl

    • I asked a girl I met if I could take her out to dinner.

    The joke is I knew right after she said, "I'll call you," she was lying to me, not surprised even a little.

    The next joke was a part of me hoped she would call, but did I really think she was going to? I'll never be good enough for anyone, what was I thinking, why did I even bother to ask her in the first place? I think it was just to prove I was right, I'm unwanted.

    LONELINESS EQUALS SADNESS.

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