You jokes
If I tell you, "Jesus is the trickster," am I, or is he?
What do you call a person on fire in a wheelchair?
Hot wheels!
What do you call someone who subscribes to Toast4128 on YouTube?
A very good person.
Have you ever seen the Pokemon called Ryh... Rhydon these nuts?
Why is sex like math?
You add a bed, subtract the clothes, divide the legs, and pray there’s no multiplying.
What do you call useless skin on a penis?
A man.
Roses are red and violets are blue, I have 5 fingers, the third one's for you.
If I had a dollar for every time you said something smart, I'd be broke.
You look good now, but you’d look better hanging from my ceiling. ;)
A penguin and a polar bear are sitting in a bathtub. The penguin asks the polar bear, "Hey, can you pass the soap?" The polar bear obliges.
A few moments later, the penguin asks, "Hey, can you pass the scrubber?" The polar bear does. Shortly after that, the penguin says, "Hey, can you pass the rubber ducky?"
The polar bear, beginning to become upset, turns to the penguin and says, "What do you think I am? A radio?!"
Do you know Candice?
Nope.
Candice dick fit in your mouth.
Do you know Mike Hawk? No, who is he? Mike Hawk in your MOUTH!
Doctor: I have bad news.
Man: What?
Doctor: There are two things wrong with you. First, you have cancer.
Man: Oh, no...
Doctor: Second, you have Alzheimer's.
Man: Well, at least I don't have cancer!
Did you hear the joke about the baby with cancer? It never gets old.
Why can't you run with a pencil in the hallway? Because too many people got killed!
Did you hear that song about 9/11? It was a real banger!
I was at work and then a little kid came up to me and she said, "What happened to all the parents?" She sounded so confused, so I told her, "It's only yours, kid, they left you on purpose." She cried. I felt bad for a second and thought, oh well, time to get back to my job at the orphanage.
Bully: Ha, guess what?
Nerd: What?
Bully: You are adopted.
Nerd: At least I was wanted!
(amazing pick up line) Yoo, what if we got matching tattoos? You get two towers and I get a plane, because I crashed right into your life!
What do you call it when you have two Indians, one Black, and a fat White?
A s'more.