You jokes
Hey, guys! Just a quick reminder to spread kindness today and treat others how you want to be treated!
Rate your day on a scale of 1-10 in the comments below. Mine was about a 7. Also, can you guys please comment [on] what you guys want me to cover in these little messages? Sometimes it's hard to tell if you guys like that I'm doing this kind of stuff or not.
If you got a crush and you are a 👧🏻 girl, let him lick 👅 your vagina.
What do you call a tall terrorist?
Osama Bin Laden.
How do you make a cat say woof? You cover it in petrol and light a match.
POV: You go to Asian prison.
You get served extra rice.
I saw a fat woman at the bus stop today, so I asked her, "When's it due?"
She replied, "I'm not fucking pregnant, you rude prick!"
I said, "I meant the bus, you fat cunt!"
What’s the difference between a gay man and a refrigerator?
The refrigerator won’t fart when you pull the meat out.
Why did Hellen Keller's dogs run away?
Because wouldn't you runway too if your name was djhdhekdndyekedhekekfjkfurir?
What do you call a terrorist in water?
A bath bomb 😁
Your earlobes are so big, you can fit your mom inside of them 5000 times and still have room for more!
What do you call a teddy bear that fooled you?
Stuffed.
Why can you never trust atoms?
Because they make up everything.
On a scale from 1 to America, how free are you this weekend?
Holy cow!
A pair of cows were talking in the field. One says, “Have you heard about the mad cow disease that’s going around?”
“Yeah,” the other cow says. “Makes me glad I’m a penguin.”
What do you call 5 gays on fire?
LGBBQ.
How do you punish a blind guy?
You leave a plunger in the toilet.
What's a benefit of being an orphan?
No one makes yo mama jokes to you.
What do you call a non-binary person that is lactose intolerant?
Non-buy dairy.
What do you call a deer with no eyes?
Correctly spelled.
If your uncle Jack needed help getting off of a horse, would you help your uncle Jack off a horse?