You jokes

You might be innocent, but if you carry a large sum of cash in public, the cops won’t believe that.

What does a phone and a grandma have in common? They both die.

What's the difference between them? If you shove something up your grandma's ass, she won't come back to life.

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  • God creating cats.

    GOD: Make the most fluffy cute thing you can think of.

    ANGEL: Ok.......................................anything else?

    GOD: YES, PUT RAZOR BLADES ON ITS FEET!!!!!!!!

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  • Q: What do you get when you drop all your potato chips in your couch somewhere?

    A: A couch potato. HaHaHa

    My friend once said my opinion didn't matter. I said, "Why did you call me a female?"

    What is the difference between a dog and a cat?

    I don't know either.

    Why do you think I asked you? ;)

    What happens when you bring a paedophile to a baby's birthday party?

    You will have even more birthday parties to go to.

    You walk into an area that has big asses on the wall, and they feel lifelike, so you put your dick into them, and you go on the opposite side of the wall, and women are naked through the wall.

    A drunk guy asked his penis: 《Tell me, how can you get shorter and longer and I can't?》

    《Why don't you speak to me?》

    《Stop getting shorter and longer or I will choke you.》

    《Oh yeah, I like it ( ͡° ͜ʖ ͡°)》

    Hhhhhhhhh ♪(┌・。・)┌