You jokes
Guy feels something on his back.
“Oh God, please let that be a rifle.”
“Nope. I’m just real happy to see you.”
Catholic men say eating broccoli is like anal sex.
If you’re forced to have it as a child, you probably won’t like it as an adult.
Have you ever eaten a clock before? I heard it’s very time consuming.
You're so damn fat that the only belt that fits you is an asteroid belt.
How do you call a cop?
Through the phone.
(My puns are bad)
What do you do with a dead chemist?
You Ni-tro-gen!
I'll stop with the horrible puns if you can say a good joke.
I didn't fart. My ass likes you so much, it just blew you a kiss!
Do you wanna hear a Gay Joke...
Butt fuck it.
This is a lot like anal sex.
You always miss 100% of the shots if you don't take it.
What do you get when you light Stephen Hawking on fire? A fried PC.
What job do you want if you don't want people's twos since?
A Catholic priest.
Do you like fish sticks?
If you do, you're a gay fish.
What do you call an epileptic midget that works at Little Caesars?
Little Seizures.
I was in a public bathroom in a handicap stall, and when I got out, a handicapped man told me that I was an a**hole. I told him, "Bet you won't stand up and say that to my face," and then he broke down.
What did Harry Houdini say when he did his famous vanishing act at a sushi place?
"Now sashimi, now you don't!"
Some people decide to start a blog.
Others decide to start a blog.
You know what my sink started?
A clog.
What do you call a three-legged cow?
Disabled.
How do you get a million Pikachus in a bus?
You shove them on!
What do you call a fish with no eyes?
Sinocyclocheilus anophthalmus.