You jokes
Guy 1: Why is my cat so angry?
Guy 2: Because she wants to eat your big sausage.
Guy 1: Don't you?
Guy 2: Yeah, it seems delicious.
Guy 1: Mmm, so... w-wait what are you doing? I didn't think you meant the one in my lunch :< Where are you leaving #_#
**Meow...**
Guy 1: Shut up, I will never feed you this sausage. It's not for you :< -_- </3
What happens when a guy is in a pool with a deck and no one is around? The guy has to pee, get up on the deck, and stick it between the bars and pee.
Do you know the difference between toilet paper and a shower curtain?
So you're the one!
Knock knock.
Who's there?
Dyslexic.
Dyslexic who?
You.
What do you call two Latinos playing baseball one on one?
A sad guy called "nun" is crying next to the grave of his best friend called "month". "Month" got killed by a gay guy, and after that, "nun" got homophobic.
While "nun" is sitting next to "month"'s grave, he heard a guy ask his friend: 《Do You Wanna Play A Game On?》 "Nun" got angry and he asked that guy: 《What did you just say to your friend?》 The guy answers: 《A game on, why?》
"Nun" kills the two guys.
🤔
What do you call a bull sleeping?
A bull-dozer.
When you have a bladder infection,
You're in trouble. 😜
What do you call an overweight psychic?
A four chin teller.
What do you call a skeleton with a mask and a knife?
A heartless killer.
Children are like farts.
You can only tolerate your own.
What do you call a Mexican without a car?
Carlos.
What do you call a dead human?
A DEAD HUMAN! HAHAHahahah ha.. ha.. ha Am I the only one laughing?
Me and my grandpa went on a road trip, and he died. That was the last thing we did together, and I will never forget his last words: “WAKE UP YOU DUMBASS!”
Three men are shipwrecked on a jungle island and taken prisoner by the residing cannibals. They are all told to walk into the jungle and come back with one piece of fruit. They go in and the first man comes out with a peach. He is instructed to shove it in his ass, and if he laughs, he will be killed. He tries and dies.
The second man comes back with a grape and is instructed to do the same. When the two meet at the pearly gates, the first man says, "I had a peach. They're fuzzy. You had a grape. What's your excuse?"
"Well, I was doing fine until I saw Jimmy come out of the brush with a pineapple."
A little boy and a little girl are taking a bath together. The little girl looks down at the boy and says, "Can I touch it?" The little boy looks back at her and says, "Hell no, you already broke yours off!"
Bully: You are a piece of shit.
Person: No, I'm not a piece, and I'm not brown... so no, honey.
Are you from Tennessee, because I eat ass.
How are guys and tile floors alike?
If you lay them right the first time you can walk all over them for years.
What is the difference between a baby and a trampoline?
You take your shoes off to jump on one.