Yell

Yell jokes

Whale

  • So, there was a male whale and a female whale swimming through the ocean. One day the male whale sees a ship and says, "That's the ship that killed my parents!" So they go to the ship and blow the ship over and throw the men overboard into the sea.

    The male whale sees the man who killed his parents and he was still alive, so he opened his mouth and went for the man, but out of nowhere the female whale yells, "Hey!! I was in it for the blowjob, but I'm not gonna eat seamen!"

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  • Inmate

  • The inmates are yelling 12...12...12... in the courtyard.

    A man walking by is interested why the keep chanting 12...12...12... so he sticks his head through the fence and the inmate poked the man in the eye.

    Moment later they start chanting 13...13...13...

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  • Basketball Game

  • A skinny black person named "Treyvon Robinson" joins a pickup basketball game at the local court, trash-talking about his "superior athletic genes" while munching on a stolen bag of Skittles. The ref blows the whistle for a foul, and he argues, "That ain't fair, I'm just naturally dominant!"

    But the team's coach, a burly black dude who's been eyeing him all game, grabs him by the jersey, blindfolds him with a sweaty headband, slathers lube from his gym bag all over, and pile-drives his ass courtside in a twisted BDSM slam dunk, yelling, "Now taste the rainbow, punk!"

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  • Suicide

  • A hot woman is ready to jump from a bridge and commit suicide when an ugly, stinky homeless man comes up to her and tells her, "Oh baby, you so hot, let's fuck!"

    She just yells, "Get the fuck away, you creep!"

    He just laughs and says, "Alright, I'll wait down there."

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  • Fish

  • Adam and Eve were sitting on the beach one day, and Eve says to Adam, "Let's go for a swim." Adam replies, "I'm not in the mood."

    She says, "Okay, I will go by myself." She puts her toes in the water and splashes around and says, "The water is beautiful, come in!" Adam replies, "Na, still not in the mood."

    Eve wades into the water until she gets to her waist. Adam jumps up and yells at Eve standing waist deep and says, "Oh no, now all the fish are gonna smell like that!"

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  • People

  • 9 people walked into Bunnings Warehouse.

    2 people bought plants.

    3 people bought shovels.

    1 person yelled.

    3 people left Bunnings Warehouse.

    1 person was me. I guess those three people are fired! 💁‍♀️🤦‍♀️

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  • Man

  • Man yelling at mailman realizes he's opening the mailbox.

    Mailman: "There's a pipe bomb in your mailbox..."

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  • CPR

  • I was at a restaurant and a waitress yelled, "Does anyone know CPR?" I said, "I know the whole alphabet." Everyone laughed and laughed, well, everyone except one.

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  • Divorce

  • I was once caught doing it with a 16 year old in my bedroom. Boy, was my wife mad. She yelled "HOW CAN YOU F*** OUR DAUGHTER?!". Haha, yeah, she was mad.

    Anyways, that's why your mother and I are getting a divorce, Timmy.

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  • Family

  • I was at a friend's place yesterday, and... There was a mother, father, three sons, and a daughter.

    That night the mother and father started fucking each other. I yelled and told them there are innocent children in this house.

    An hour later, they started up again. I walked to their room and they were asleep, so I looked in the brothers' room and all three brothers were fucking the sister.

    I sighed at this. "Incest aside, you guys make a cute family." I started, "So Anna, when am I gonna have nieces and nephews?" They stopped instantly and went to sleep. "Thank you," I replied before walking back to my room they let me sleep in and I passed out for the rest of the night.

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  • Boy

  • A boy and girl are fucking. The girl yells "Senpai!" The boy smiles, pleased, but then her father walks in and says "What?"

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  • Hunter

  • Two hunters are out in the woods when one of them collapses. He’s not breathing and his eyes are glazed.

    The other guy whips out his cell phone and calls 911.

    “I think my friend is dead!” he yells. “What can I do?”

    The operator says, “Calm down. First, let’s make sure he’s dead.”

    There’s a silence, then a shot. Back on the phone, the guy says, “OK, now what?”

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