Yeah jokes
Me: When I saw an orphan on the street in rags.
Also me: Are you okay?
Orphan: Yeah, what gave it away?
Me: Because you have no family.
Did you know that graveyards are the most popular place in the world?
Yeah, people are just DYING to get in there...
Male Patient: So I just pull my pants down and bend over for my prostate exam.
Doctor: Yup.
Male: Ok I'm ready....hey doc that doesn't feel like a finger.
Doctor: He he yeah...im not a doctor.
POKEMON THEME SONG JOKE: I wanna be the berry best, like no one ever was.
To bitch them is my real pest, to brain them in my toss. I will gravel across the land, perching war and wide. Fuse Pokemon to under-strand, the lower that's in psyche.
Poke him on! Gotta joke them all it's Fru and me, All I know is my dress tiny, Poke him on! Yeah, you're my pest friend, In a world you must de-blend, Poke him on!
Gotta joke them all my shirts so true, My outrage will flush us through. You bitch me and I ditch you, P-O-K-E-M-O-N!!!
Gotta joke them all, Gotta joke them all!
Poke him on!
Fence 1 was thinking and Fence 2 said, "Are you still on the fence about running away?"
Fence 1 said, "Yeah, I was thinking of running on the RAILROAD."
Did you hear about the light bulb party? Yeah, it was pretty lit!
As a son, I like sports, and I watch sports with my mom. So one day, we were looking at football. My mom asked me who makes the most money. I said the quarterback.
My mom told me I'm going to get a quarterback as my new boyfriend, and it'll be your new stepfather. A week later, my mom went out. I came home, and I see my mom making out with a high school kid. I said, "What's going on?" My mom said, "Look, my new boyfriend and new stepfather is the high school quarterback." My mom said, "See, mission accomplished." I said, "Yeah, job well done."
Aiden and Gwen! Are Aiden and Gwen dating? 'Cause if they are, then oooooooooooooooooooooooooooo!
Kenya says: Yes, they are deep in love!
Tenya says: Yeah, but I think he would be good with Hoochie girl 101!
Gwen says: Guys stop! You really think that!
Tenya and Kenya say: Yes!
Kariah says: No! I belong with him. He is MINEEEEEEEE!!!!!!!
Mariah says: Girl, you need to grow up!
Tenya says: Yeah! When are you guys getting married?
Lariah says: YEAH!!!!!!
Iariah says: Yeah!!!!!!!
Gwen says: Next Sunday!
All girls say: Yeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeee!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! Next Sunday, they got married! YAYAYAYYAYAYAY!
Mariah says: Congrats!
Kenya says: Yeah!
Kariah says: Hi Aiden, super cute tux!
Lariah says: Wooohoooo!
Iariah says: Yeah! U won it!
Tenya: This is you guys' time to shine!!!!!!!!
And they lived happily ever after...in hell! The end!
I was born on the moon.
Yeah, my mom was high, and my dad was down to earth.
Me: Hey, that's a really heavy bag, do you have a lot of books and magazines in there?
The Quiet Kid: Yeah, magazines.....
Ever heard of the band "Nothing but Thieves"?
Yeah, it's called RobberBand.
Here's a Song That Describes My Old Life-By-watersharky Productions-
My buddies think I'm on the lake.
Boss thinks I've been sick for days.
And mama's probably on her way
'Cause I ain't picked up the phone.
I've been a million places,
But they're all up in my head.
Over-drinking, overthinking ever since you left.
I've been gone, I've been gone
I've been sittin' on the couch watching TV all day long.
All day long, I've been tryin' to figure out how a good thing went wrong
Faster than that freight train, farther than that airplane
Sadder than a country song.
Headed down that highway, anywhere but my way
Ever since you moved on, I've been gone.
Took a trip down memory lane.
Checked into hotel heartbreak.
Passed rock bottom on the way
Without leaving my living room.
I've been a million places
But they're all up in my head.
Over-drinking, overthinking ever since you left.
I've been gone, I've been gone
I've been sittin' on the couch watching TV all day long.
All day long, I've been tryin' to figure out how a good thing went wrong
Faster than that freight train, farther than that airplane
Sadder than a country song.
Headed down that highway, anywhere but my way
Ever since you moved on, I've been gone.
Yeah
I've been gone.
All the clothes are on the floor
All the mail's by the door
All the whiskey bottles in my bed.
All the dishes in the sink
All the gas is in the tank
All the neighbors probably think I'm dead.
I've been gone, I've been gone
I've been sittin' on the couch watching TV all day long.
All day long, I've been tryin' to figure out how a good thing went wrong
Faster than that freight train, farther than that airplane
Sadder than a country song.
Headed down that highway, anywhere but my way
Ever since you moved on, I've been gone (ooh, ooh)
I've been gone (ooh, ooh)
Gone
Ur mum smells like shit, yeah, so she sucks a man off and washing machine. Yo, don’t at me, yeah, you chicken breath.
"Do you have a noose?"
"Nose?"
"Yeah, noose- nose... I heard yours was stuffed lately--haha."
"I actually smell something--like a corpse. Is it you?"
"No."
*Dying on the inside has never been so detectable.*
Please folks, you can hit the thumbs up button on the ones you like. There is no need to repost.
Anyways,
Knock knock Who's there? Can I come in? Can I come in who? Can I Come In You!?
More often than not, I will cry when I masturbate. Some nights I'm a real tear jerker!
But on the nights and I smoke a lil pot and then masturbate, my dad ends up bugging me because I am a weed wacker.
How do you keep a dog from humping your leg? Pick him up and suck his dick.
How does Popeye keep his manly part from rusting? He sticks it in Olive Oil.
Snow White and the seven dwarfs are in the the tub feeling "HAPPY". Happy got out now they are fucking "GRUMPY".
What's worse than waking up and finding a "Penis" drawn on your forehead? Finding out it was "Traced".
If I had a rooster and you had a donkey and your donkey ate my rooster what would you have? 3 feet of my cock up your ass.
Did you know Batman was actually Black? Yeah he couldn't go a night with out Robyn!
Did you hear Gods Word Of The Day? Its Legs! Now lets go out and spread them.
What do you call a Mexican woman with no legs? Cunt-sway-low
Whats worse than sucking 25 oysters out of your Grandmas Pussy? Realizing you only put in 15.
Are you gay? Yeah, because I loved you.
My crush: "I cut 4 inches off my hair yesterday." Me: "So?" My crush: "4 inches is a lot!" Me: "Oh yeah?"
Yeah, I keep telling everyone 9/11 jokes, but they all just crash and burn.
I got rejected from art school today, so yeah.
This ole boy picked up this hooker and was getting some head driving down the road, and she started gagging on it a little, and he said, "Oh yeah baby, you like that big dick, don't ya?" and she said, "Oh baby, it's not that, ya asshole stinks!"