Worry

Worry Jokes

Two cows are standing in a field. One cow says to the other "What do you think about that mad cow disease". The other replies "Well I don't have to worry about it. You're talking to a telephone pole.".

I saw this one quote of the people who smile the most are covering the most pain I think this is true just not with everyone. As I am really depressed and act like myself with my friends but with my parents and family I force a smile so they don't worry more than they do. I did a test for my therapy session to see what level of depression I had. It came back with severe 22/24 but I asked her to tell my mum it came back as moderate saying I would tell her that my depression got worse she went along with it but I haven't told my mum and I know make things sound like I aren't as messed up as I truly am to my therapist

Wife:I think these pants are getting too small for me!

Husband: Dont worry, maybe you are just bad at laundry.

A mom and her son are taking a walk when they pass a homeless man fapping, the boy asks "what is that man doing?". The mom says "Making pizza" trying to turn him away.

The son sees a dog fucking another dog and he asks the same thing. She says "Making extra cheese". When they pass a window and see a couple doing it, he asks the same thing. She says "Ordering the pizza".

Later that day the mother says to the father "I think I want some to order some pizza with extra cheese tonight, dont know why that sounds good".

So that night the husband who was watching tv yelled up the stairs "wanna order some pizza !?"

The mother replied "DONT WORRY IM MAKING SOME"

the sons voice followed " IM ADDING EXTRA CHEESE"

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The person I hate. Omg my mom and dad just died. Me. Omg I am so sorry dount worry. The person I hate. I have a boyfriend. Me well I have a mom and dad. The person I hate. Rood. Me. Shut up.

So one day I was walking home from school with my best friend sally. She was worried to get home because she was going to tell her mom that bob the class rep got her pregnant a eight months ago and now it was obvious she was pregnant. So I said “sally it’ll be ok I’m sure she’ll be happy to get a grandson” “yeah thanks suzy” she said to me then went into her house. The next few weeks she didn’t show up to school so I was like oh she must be in trouble with her mom I’ll go check on her So I walk up to her house and her mom answers with a baby boy in her hands “oh hello. Is that Sally’s son!! Can I see sally?” Her mom says sure and I go inside but she leads me to the backyard and I see a tombstone “here lies sally 2004-2020” so I ask her mom in tears “oh did she not make it through the birth?” And her mom replied “you could say that..”

5

When someone said to an orphan my boyfriend ghosted me the orphan says back don't worry my parents ghosted me 🤣

Guy : are you depression cause you're crippling me Car driver : no I'm the guy that hit you with his car and crippled you Guy : don't worry I was already crippled because I got crippling depression

When a fat person wants to kill themselves... why are they so worried? The diabetes will get to them sooner or later!

Waiter says "Sir we ran out of ranch, so I had the boys in the back improvise. But don't worry... It has even more zip & twang to it"