Why jokes
Why couldn’t the peanut finish the project?
Work came to a grinding halt.
Why does Ms. Mushroom 🍄 go out with Mr. Mushroom 🍄?
Because he’s a fungi.
Why couldn't the teacher let her kids out?
Because she has no arms to open the door.
Ok, now I'm not good at telling jokes, but this one is not too bad. One cunt said to another cunt, "Do you get cold at night?"
"Fuck no, cunt," the first cunt said, "Why?"
"I have a built-in set of vertical curtains to keep the cold out, cunt!" xx
Why did the orphan fall out of the tree?
They thought their parents would catch them.
Why did the octopus beat the shark in a fight? -- Because the octopus was well armed.
Why did the boy leave his chestnuts in the rain?
He wanted them rusted.
Why are orphans so bad at poker?
They don’t know what a full house looks like.
Why should you never give Elsa a balloon?
'Cause she will let it go.
Why can’t orphans be a space ship? Because they don’t have a mothership!
Why were 9/11 victims so mad?
They ordered three pepperoni pizzas, not two planes!
Why do orphans rob banks?
Because they wanna feel wanted.
Why did the United Nations stop the French government from using the guillotine in public?
Because the French government was using the guillotine on newborn babies for circumcision.
Why did the orphan sleep outside? ... Because he gets to wake up to Mother Nature.
Why do orphans play baseball because they try to find home?
I asked Siri why I am still single; she showed me a pic of my mom riding on my dick!
Why can't you tell an Indian a secret? Because the red dot means they're recording!
The difference between women and beer is that beer makes you happy for nothing, why women make you angry for nothing.
Man: "I know how to please a woman." Woman: "Then please leave me alone."
Man: "I want to give myself to you." Woman: "Sorry, I don't accept cheap gifts."
Man: "Your hair color is fabulous." Woman: "Thank you. It's on aisle three at the corner drug store."
Man: "You look like a dream." Woman: "Go back to sleep."
Man: "I can tell that you want me." Woman: "Yes, I want you to leave."
Man: "Hey, baby, what's your sign?" Woman: "Do not enter. -OR- Stop."
Man: "Your body is like a temple." Woman: "Sorry, there are no services today."
Man: "Is this seat empty?" Woman: "Yes, and this one will be too if you sit down."
Man: "What's it like being the most beautiful girl in the bar?" Woman: "I hate you."
Man: "Haven't I seen you someplace before?" Woman: "Yeah, that's why I don't go there anymore."
Why did the rapper bring a ladder to the studio?
Because he heard the "mic drop" was too high!