Whos jokes
A leaf and an emo kid fall from a tree, who hits the ground first? The leaf, because the rope stopped the emo kid.
What do you call a horny emo who practices self-control?
An edgelord.
Who are the fastest readers?
9/11 victims.
What do you call someone who’s blond, beautiful, and listens to what you’re saying, but only hears what they want?
Womxn
There was a guy who got his whole left side shot off.
When he was at the hospital and he woke up, he asked the doctor if he was okay.
The doctor said, "You're all right now."
Memes
Deck the halls with bowels of Holly, fa la la la la, la la la la.
If you're having a bad day, just slap an orphan. Who are they going to tell? Their parents?
There’s only one answer to who would win, 1996 Bulls or 2017 Warriors...
...Steve Kerr’s team.
What do you call a man who loves Adidas and Puma and drives a Volkswagen? Potential Nazi.
It wasn't Islam that radicalized the terrorists who did 9/11.
Jenga comes to mind, though!
Knock, knock.
Who's there?
Nacho.
Nacho who?
Nacho Cheese!
Knock knock.
Who's there?
Ahoy Mateys.
Ahoy Mateys who?
Ahoy mateys, balls fit in your mouth? LOLOLOLOLOLOL
Bully: Who you looking at?
Me: A Build-A-Bear.
Bully: Where?
Me: Look in the mirror.
What do you call someone who’s afraid of breaststroke? Chicken breast.
Knock knock.
Who's there?
Donut.
Did you hear about that one guy who dipped his balls in paint?
My friend said they were “Pretty nuts!”
Why did the chicken cross the road?
To eat Bob's arms.
Bob went to hospital and had no arms.
Knock knock.
Who's there?
Not Bob.
What do you call a kid who sings well?
Melodic Minor.
Who’s better, Bird or Magic?
Do you know Joe?
Joe who?
Joe *boom*.
Knock knock.
Who's there?
Terrier.
Terrier who?
Your Halloween decorations are terri-fying!