When jokes

I'm surprised that the tree is still standing when my emo friend is hanging from it.

Just remembering the day when the Jets beat the New York Giants.

I love when I could run through the grass and feel the wind on my face.

Then my mom told me to get off VR, and then I wheeled myself to her.

If I was an object in this world, I’d be a glass! Because if you leave me when I’m too close to the edge, I will likely shatter and break.

I get jealous when my phone dies.

This year I'm going to name my Christmas tree Amy Winehouse, because when it dies it will leave needles all over the living room.

My sister told me only onions make you cry, so I always hit her back when she hit me, but I hit her with a shoe only to catch her cry.

What happened when the depressed person waved at a tree?

It left him hanging.

What does Marcus Rashford say when he comes to the stadium?

I wanna kick some balls!

Yo mama so fat, when God said, "Let there be light!" she blocked the sun. Now we call her the moon.

My sister said that I need to stop with the audited butt:

I got it from her when I was born.

Yo mama so dumb that when she saw the "log in" page on her computer, she went and put a log in it.

Yo mama so fat when I pushed her into the jacuzzi, it caused a level 8 tsunami.

What's the difference between an emo kid and an onion?

You cry when you cut an onion.

How do you know when you're disliked?

When they always give you the camera for group photos.

What's the difference between onions and children? Nothing, when you cut one everyone around you cries.

When Cincinnati played Alabama in 2021, they wore black at their funeral! 🤣

Yesterday I asked an emo girl if she's jealous when her phone dies.

What do you tell a suicidal person when they complain about their problems to you?

Just hang in there, man.

Yo mama so fat that when she went out in high heels, she came back in flip flops.