When jokes

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People

  • I have two things I wanna say:

    1. When people swear, stop taking it so fucking literally. If someone calls you a bitch, they're not calling you a female dog. If they call you a cunt, they're not calling you a woman's private part, they are calling you either an idiot, scaredy cat/baby, or something along those lines, ffs.

    2. wtf

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  • Shooter

  • When you are sleeping in class and the shooter sees you, then they wake you up and say, "Let’s team up," like, what the f*ck?

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    Orphan

  • Teacher: I was an orphan when I was younger.

    Student: Oof.

    Teacher: Is anyone not here?

    Student: Yes, your parents.

    Masturbation

  • Have you ever had a friend who masturbated many times? I had one who did a lot, but he had no imagination... when he masturbated, he imagines his hand.

  • 0
  • Male

  • What does a refrigerator and a gay male have in common?

    Only one farts when you pull the meat out. 🌝🌝🌝

  • 1
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    Sauce

  • What happens when you make an asían girl squirt?

    She charges you 10 cents for extra sauce.

  • 2
  • Popsicle

  • What do you say to your customer at a popsicle stand when he asks for the price?

    Dollar a pop!

    Get it?

    Mama

  • Yo mama is so fat that when she sits on the internet, it will take a day to send!

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    Mamma

  • Your mamma is so fat that she saved me a lot of money by sitting in my car when I wanted to buy a low rider.